Markie23

What Al Gore has to do with your rising cell phone bill.

2011-10-18T12:44:00.000-07:00

Have you noticed your cell phone bill slowly but steadily increasing lately? I have, and not all that slowly. I just looked over my Verizon bills for the past 4 months to find out why. My "Monthly Access Charges" - are the same each month, but my taxes have gone up each of the past 4 months.

I got rid our our Land Line primarily over frustration that our monthly phone bill was more taxes than it was phone, and now our cell phones appear to be headed in the same direction.

There are two lines on the Verizon bill that have to do with taxes:

Taxes, Governmental Surcharges & Fees:
"Includes sales, excise and other taxes and governmental surcharges and fees that we are required by law to bill customers."
Verizon Wireless Surcharges and Other Charges & Credits
"Includes charges to recover or help defray costs of taxes and of governmental charges and fees imposed on us by the government. Other Charges and Credits - includes charges for products and services, and credits owing."

So there are the taxes the Government imposes, and the ones Verizon imposes because the government imposes taxes on them.

Here's the breakdown for the past 4 months:

	Jul	Aug	Sep	Oct
Taxes, Governmental Surcharges	$7.98	$8.16	$8.87	$9.64
Verizon Wireless Surcharges	$8.46	$8.46	$8.46	$8.73
Total	$16.44	$16.62	$17.33	$18.37

That's an 11.7% increase in just the past 4 months. If the increases stopped this month I would be paying $220.44/yr just for taxes on our cell phones. But they won't stop increasing. They never stop increasing.

What is particularly annoying is that these are hidden taxes that people rarely think about. They're hidden because there is nowhere on the bill where you can get an itemized list of what these taxes are for, or where these taxes go. In fact phone companies are forbidden by law to reveal any such information. They are also taxes mainly imposed by the FCC which under the constitution should have no authority to impose taxes. If you want to know more here are two short and very informative articles about how these taxes originated:

Al Gore’s Hidden Phone Tax
Gore telephone tax unconstitutional

Yes, Al Gore invented the Internet AND a way to tax our phone bills.

Of course these types of hidden taxes are everywhere now; when you rent a car, buy a car, register a car, gas up your car, check into a hotel, buy a fishing/hunting/marriage license, book a flight, take a cruise, rent an apartment, buy a home, send your kids to school, etc, etc, etc.

I would go to war for Herman Cain's 9-9-9 plan if I thought for one second that it would replace ALL other local, state, and federal taxes including all these ubiquitous "hidden" taxes we just take for granted as part of our everyday life.

I do love the idea that EVERYONE participate in funding our government equally. I believe that if EVERYONE had skin in the game that we would be much more vigilant about seeing that our hard earned money was spent responsibly.

Ya No Hablo

2011-06-20T07:40:00.000-07:00

I spoke Spanish fluently... 30 years ago. Today I remember so little of my Spanish that I no longer list it as a skill on resumes or surveys.

I attended a mission reunion the year after I got back from Guatemala. I think they may have had one or two more after that which I didn't attend. Then for some reason there were no more reunions, until last year. I went to that one. Our mission President and his wife spoke. They are both native Guatemalans. President Amado gave most of his talk in English for the benefit of the spouses in the audience, and those like me who have pretty much forgotten the language.

Today a notice was posted on Facebook of another reunion planned for this year. I guess they are going to try and have them yearly again until we're all dead. The problem is that the notice was in Spanish and I was having a hard time trying to understand what it said so I clicked on the "Translate This Page" link. I think Facebook is forgetting its Spanish too because it's translation was about as good as mine. At least it gave me a good laugh:

Begin to prepare for our big second meeting of slippers in Utah.

The party last year was a fabulous night renew friendship .... buried under lots of years, by time and dusty occupations. In a few hours pass everything, leap from one emotion to another ... both killed me with laughter:
A woman who was there told me when I go with a pot of food is ..... Gaze into each other I was my boyfriend and now not talk to me ...... jajajajaja plane that memory fails us a bit .... another friend told me ... do not you remember me ...? were together in the prison of San Antonio ..... jajajajaja the group that wheel there will be the mouth ... and I more .... I just said I was never in jail even if some see if it deserved .... but suddenly I remembered my friend Elder xxxx ... choco a vehicle being in the mission and was not licensed and was to jail for a week and this friend that he was 17 entonses hiso company ... I actually had to go to lawyer advocates trying to out do .. obiamente time data is lost or distorted images and words .... but definitely old memories come back for more and better jets.
Friends, wherever you are it's time to make plans, to find ourselves in a trip back THROUGH the eyes of our good friends ....

White Women Need Not Apply.

2011-05-10T14:55:00.000-07:00

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

People would be outraged, including myself- and rightly so - if a similar program were set up that specifically excluded black and Hispanic women. Can you imagine?... "Sorry honey, your skin is just too dark to be learning about computers". So can someone explain to me why this is not only acceptable but praiseworthy?

BTW it contained some false reporting:

The line

"her goal, to increase the number of women in science, technology and math"

should have said

"her goal, to increase the number of black and Hispanic women in science, technology and math".

The line

"A program just for girls that is creating a new generation of tech savy women"

should have said

"A program just for black and Hispanic girls that is creating a new generation of tech savy women of color"

What would you do with 1.6 Million Dollars?

2011-01-18T08:09:00.000-08:00

Well, the federal government printed up a couple trillion dollars it didn't have and dolled it out at will; and this school district in Alaska ended up with 1.6 million dollars of it. They chose to buy iPads for themselves and their students.

This is quite a national party we're having isn't it? It's so much fun! Free iPads for EVERYONE!! I can't imagine the national hangover we're going to have in the morning but for now it's a blast. If your kids didn't come home with free iPads I would talk to your school administrators about it. They probably spent it on something so not fun... like plumbing repairs, new classrooms, textbooks, and the like. Or maybe they just gave themselves a bonus or pay raise. Or perhaps the sloppy joes are tasting just a little better this year.

If the government came to you and said, hey... here's 1.6 million dollars of FREE MONEY to do with what you will, what would YOU spend it on?

Why We Shouldn't Raise Taxes on the Rich (Political Post)

2010-12-08T08:09:00.000-08:00

This clip from the Today show explains why we should not raise taxes on the rich.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Viera asks a good question - with such an enormous national debt can we afford to give a 60 billion dollar tax cut to those making over $250,000 a year?
I might have agreed with Burnett's answer that no, we can't afford it; given this:

But then sweet little Erin Burnett spoke some absolute truth that rang in my ears like a Christmas Bell. Said Erin, "If we didn't give people over $250,000 the tax break here, we'd save 60 billion a year. And for that, we could have universal preschool for free and provide free college tuition for half the college students in this country".

You see liberals would have no interest in using that money to reduce our national debt, balance our budget, and become more independent. They are only interested in ever growing the size of government and making their citizens more and more dependent on them for all their needs.

When did the Federal Government ever get the idea that it was their roll to provide free retirement, free health care, free preschool, free college education, free broadband internet, a grocery store and fitness center on every corner (see my Food Desert Posts for more info) and two cars in every garage? And whoever in the world ever bought into the idea that any of it would ever really be "free"?

Here is a short, by no means inclusive, list of taxes that didn't exist 100 years ago when our nation was still the most prosperous in the world, and we had absolutely no national debt, the largest middle class in the world, and mom stayed home to raise the kids.

Building Permit Tax, CDL License Tax, Cigarette Tax, Corporate Income Tax, Dog License Tax, Federal Income Tax (Fed), Federal Unemployment Tax (FU TA), Fishing License Tax, Food License Tax, Fuel Permit Tax, Gasoline Tax, Hunting License Tax, Inheritance Tax, Inventory Tax, IRS Interest Charges (tax on top of tax), IRS Penalties(tax on top of tax), Liquor Tax, Luxury Tax, Marriage License Tax, Medicare Tax, Property Tax, Real Estate Tax, Service charge taxes, Social Security Tax, Road Usage Tax (Truckers), Sales Taxes
Recreational Vehicle Tax, School Tax, State Income Tax, State Unemployment Tax (SUTA), Telephone Federal Excise Tax, Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax, Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Tax, Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax, Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax, Telephone State and Local Tax, Telephone Usage Charge Tax, Utility Tax, Vehicle License Registration Tax, Vehicle Sales Tax, Watercraft Registration Tax, Well Permit Tax, Workers Compensation Tax

I recently noticed this "Explanation of Charges" on my Verizon Bill:

Verizon Wireless' Surcharges include charges to recover or help defray costs of taxes and of governmental charges and fees imposed on us, including a Regulatory Charge (which helps defray costs of various regulatory mandates, including government number administration and license fees) and a Federal Universal Service Charge (and, if applicable, a State Universal Service Charge) to recover costs imposed on us by the government to support universal service, and may include other charges also related to our governmental costs.

In other words - We are a corporation and therefore do not pay taxes. Instead we pass those taxes directly on to you.

I copied the following from a web site for a local candidate who was running for Congress for the Constitution party. I LOVE IT. And yes, I voted for him over our Republican candidate. He lost the election, but gained a devoted fan.

I understand that I don’t represent you. I represent your God-given rights under our Constitution. What does that mean? It means I understand the proper role of government. As stated in the Declaration of Independence: “That to secure these rights (unalienable rights endowed by our Creator), governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed.” This means the only reason our government exists is to secure our God-given rights. Anything the government tries to do beyond securing our God-given rights is beyond its proper scope and unconstitutional.
Another way to think of this: because the government is “by the people” it should not have any powers beyond those powers that individuals themselves hold. If it does, then the created is more powerful than the creator. The individual only has power to protect their God-given rights, “among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” (note the word “pursuit” – we are not guaranteed happiness, only the right to seek it out)
No matter how noble it may seem to take from those that “have” to support those that “have not,” that action is clearly outside the scope of the rights of the individual. For example, if I forced you to give me your money in order to help a needy neighbor, I would be prosecuted for breaking the law. When our government forces us to pay money to redistribute to those groups they deem worthy of such funds, it is somehow seen as legal and even compassionate. When understood this way it is overwhelming to think of how many laws and programs that our government has created that are outside of the scope of its constitutional power.
If everyone in Congress and the Senate understood this philosophy, our country would be very different than it is now. The difference between Republicans and Democrats is only the different ways they present and pass these unconstitutional laws. The problem is that our current representatives believe their duty as your “representative” is to represent the will and wishes of their constituency. The will and wishes of the people is their own business and possibly the business of local and state governments. The federal government should only be concerned with, and represent, the God-given rights of the individual.

"Government is not reason, it is not eloquence -- it is force! Like fire it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master!" - George Washington

We R The Heart

2010-11-18T17:12:00.000-08:00

I Am Not The Biggest Loser.

2010-11-17T14:59:00.001-08:00

I'm a big winner! My sweepstakes obsession has paid off again.

First last month when out of the blue I got a $250 check from Kellogs, and then yesterday...

I won this:

A 4 day three night vacation at this resort in Hollywood! No, the other Hollywood.... the one in Florida. I didn't even know Florida had a Hollywood, but they do. It's between Ft. Lauderdale and Miami.

BTW, I Know that the prize package above says this resort is in Ft. Lauderdale, but I looked it up. Trust me, it's in Hollywood. Here are some pic's

I got a package with all the release and tax forms - cause the IRS wants a piece of my vacation too you know.

So this will make a nice 10 year Wedding Anniversary getaway next March dontcha think? Can't wait!!

Curses to Hot Pants and her Pirate friends.

2010-08-27T13:06:00.000-07:00

Why is it that when I Google "Catching Fire" +"Hunger Games" +SRBC +cake +"Seneca Crane" this comes up...

Instead of this...

Or at least THIS...

???

The Odds Are Ever In My Favor

2010-08-11T11:21:00.001-07:00

Cake contest? Pshhaw... I'm a Hunger Games winner already. What did I win? A paper back copy of HG + a $25 visa gift card.

Then & Now

2010-08-04T11:57:00.000-07:00

Fresca and other Food Oddities.

2010-07-20T11:09:00.000-07:00

I'm a latecomer to the diet soda craze, but I am a true Diet Coke addict now. It started when someone convinced me to try Diet Coke with lime. It wasn't bad... and after I got used to it and actually started to crave it, I found that other diet sodas weren't quite as gaggy any more.

We were at a picnic recently where someone brought some diet Fresca. Actually "diet" Fresca is redundant, since there is no such thing as "regular" Fresca. In fact you won't find the word diet anywhere on the can - smart marketing Coca-Cola company. Anyway, I have to say... yummy! Especially the peach. So we are now stocked up on the stuff. It doesn't have the caffeine, but it does have phenylketonurics which sounds like one of those made up words... like Retsyn, Techron, and Antioxidant.

I looked up phenylketonurics on Wikipedia and this is what it came up with:
Phenylketonuria (PKU) is an autosomal recessive metabolic genetic disorder characterized by a deficiency in the hepatic enzyme phenylalanine hydroxylase (PAH).

Oh... Kay... I still don't know what it is and what it's doing in my soda. I don't have any autosomal recessive metabolic genetic disorders that I'm aware of. But I'm sure that since the FDA approved it, it MUST be safe... at least in small amounts... right?

However, I noticed at lunch today that I was eating my Healthy Choice Cafe Steamer "Roasted Chicken Fresca", while drinking a... Fresca. Is that too much Fresca? I had to look at the ingredient list of the Chicken Fresca to see if it also had phenylala-hukilaus. Nope, no phenyl-yourabitneurotic's but I did see some other shocking ingredients.

I'm not gonna mention all the stuff in there that I can't pronounce and don't have a clue what it is, but why in the world does my HEALTHY choice meal contain "rendered chicken fat, turkey fat, chicken and turkey fat" (that's right they are listed twice like that). I realize that you might get some fat with your chicken, but do they have to add extra rendered chicken fat; and throw some turkey fat in there for good measure... and then, cuz it's not enough fat, put some MORE chicken and turkey fat in?

This meal is still a scant 230 calories, but I have a feeling that it's not because it's really healthy, but rather because it contains about a half a cup of food. Couldn't they cut out that added fat, and instead substitute it with some laboratory produced, unpronounceable chemical compound with a made up word... like antiflabbynoids?

More Freecycle

2010-07-06T09:22:00.000-07:00

It's fresh, it's cool, and you could win it!

2010-06-10T14:25:00.000-07:00

Have you received your share of stimulus yet?

2010-04-05T07:44:00.000-07:00

You are aware that the Government is handing out money like crazy right? 825 Billion dollars in "Stimulus" money to be exact. That comes out to $7,173.91 for every household in America. So are you going to get any of that free money? It's more likely that you are going to have to pay for it instead, cuz let's face it, nothing is really free is it? Somebody has to pay for it. My taxes went up quite a bit this year. I called our HR office to find out why. They told me that it's because the tax tables have changed due to President Obama's stimulus package.
So where is the money going, and how can I get my hands on some? That's the question that's been on my mind lately as I see people scrambling for a piece of the pie. This one little item from a news story has really been eating me up over the past couple weeks:
-------------------

In Illinois, the city of Chicago received $7 million to spur economic development in a handful of disadvantaged neighborhoods with a broadband awareness and adoption program that will include computers and training opportunities for more than 11,000 residents.

Competition for the grants was fierce, Locke said. The Commerce Department's Broadband Technology Opportunities Program received more than 1,800 applications proposing projects totaling nearly $19 billion during the first funding round.
------------------

Let me break it down:
In Illinois, the city of Chicago received $7 million
Why Chicago? Are they somehow suffering more than any other city from lack of broadband? Or did they just apply for money faster than everyone else, or just make a better argument than anyone else, or did somebody owe somebody a favor, or make a promise for a quid-pro-quo? I don't know the answer, I'm just very curious why Chicago gets $7 million. And also realize that it's the CITY of Chicago that gets the money - not the disadvantaged neighborhoods they speak of. How much of the money will actually reach those people after "the city" dips their hands into it?
to spur economic development in a handful of disadvantaged neighborhoods with a broadband awareness and adoption program
What does "broadband awareness" even mean? Are people just not aware that there are other options besides dial-up? Aren't the constant advertisements from Comcast and other internet providers making people aware enough? And I'm curious as to exactly HOW giving people free computers and making them more aware of broadband will spur economic development - more than say, just writing them a check for $7,173.91. Remember this stimulus package could cover a check for $7,173.91 not just for a handful of Chicago neighborhoods, but for EVERY household in America. Then EVERY household could buy a really nice computer and monitor for under $1,000, and they would still have over $6,000 left (if you ignore the fact that we'll have to pay for it all through our taxes anyway).
that will include computers and training opportunities for more than 11,000 residents.
Did you see The Blind Side recently? I knew you did. I am picturing a Chicago suburb that looks very much like Big Mike's old neighborhood, with truckloads full of free computers pulling in and all of Big Mike's old buddies running to the trucks to grab as much free booty as they can - so they can get started on installing Quickbooks Pro, and getting their small businesses up and running right? No? Well, some of them might. It's not out of the realm of possibility. It might also be possible that some of Big Mikes friends will sell them for drug money, or use them to all manner of lascivious activities including child pornography, and internet predation - all thanks to our generous tax donations.
Competition for the grants was fierce, Locke said. The Commerce Department's Broadband Technology Opportunities Program received more than 1,800 applications proposing projects totaling nearly $19 billion
Of course competition was fierce. You advertise that you are giving away 6 billion dollars to expand broadband in rural areas and people are going to scramble for it. As long as the Government is willing to take taxpayer money and offer it up for grabs, and as long as there are people who don't care that the money came from their own pockets, and the pockets of their neighbors the competition will continue to be fierce.
during the first funding round.
There's more?

Now, if I want to be a leech too, and try and get my hands on some of the money that the Government took from us and is now handing out, what would my chances be of getting a slice? Remember they offered 6 Billion and got over 16 Billion in requests. I'm obviously not as deserving as Big Mikes buddies, and I really have nothing to offer in return. If I were the head of a Union and could promise protesters at a rally, or a politician who could offer a vote on a piece of legislation, or an endorsement to a certain program, then I might get somewhere. But I'm afraid my sphere of influence doesn't go much past this blog, and I don't think anyone is even paying attention to IT lately.

Users Group Meeting

2010-03-29T15:29:00.001-07:00

Internet Porn Deserts

2010-03-26T07:01:00.000-07:00

If you followed my previous few posts you'll know that the federal government has earmarked billions of dollars to eliminate food deserts in 7 years. I also made this prophetic statement:

"I can see that grocery stores are clearly not the only problem the government can help us with. There are also fast food deserts, restaurant deserts, convenience store deserts, car deserts, farmers market deserts, and recreation and fitness facility deserts."

Well, I missed one. Internet Porn Deserts. Yes, millions of Americans do not have the same equal access to internet porn that the rest of us do. But the government is once again on top of it. Here are the headlines:

FCC set to unveil sweeping national broadband plan

WASHINGTON — Communications regulators on Tuesday will unveil a sweeping proposal to overhaul U.S. broadband policy. Their aim: to bring affordable, high-speed Internet connections to all Americans and make access much faster for people who already have broadband.

FCC chairman calls for ultra-high-speed broadband

WASHINGTON — The nation's top telecommunications regulator says he wants 100 million U.S. households to have access to have ultra-high-speed Internet connections by 2020.

Speaking in Washington on Tuesday, Federal Communications Commission Chairman Julius Genachowski said those connections should be 100 megabits per second, several times faster than most home connections now. He also wants the U.S. to establish testbed networks to experiment with even higher broadband speeds.

Both proposals will be part of a national broadband plan that the FCC will deliver to Congress next month. The plan was mandated by last year's economic stimulus bill.

Ok, I know that not all internet traffic is porn. They are also eliminating Blog deserts, Facebook deserts, YouTube deserts; e-Bay, G-Mail, and Wikipedia deserts; IMDB, online sweepstakes, and bejeweled deserts; Twitter, Amazon, Hulu, Bit-Torrents.... the list of deserts goes on and on.

One of the biggest deserts is on the Navajo Indian reservation:

Grant to fund high-speed Internet on Navajo Nation

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — The federal government is investing more than $32 million in stimulus funds to help the nation's largest American Indian reservation, the Navajo Nation, build a high-speed Internet highway that will connect thousands of homes and businesses across the sprawling reservation.

U.S. Commerce Secretary Gary Locke announced the grant Thursday, saying Navajo communities in New Mexico, Arizona and Utah will benefit from 550 miles of new fiber optic cables and 59 new or modified microwave towers that will be capable of blanketing 15,000 square miles.

The funding awarded to the Navajo Tribal Utility Authority was among $63 million in federal investments announced by Locke. All of the money is aimed at increasing broadband access in remote or underserved communities in more than a dozen states.

Nearly $4 million will go toward creating a dozen new public computer centers in several other states.

Once the infrastructure is in place, officials say affordable broadband service will be accessible to 30,000 homes, 1,000 businesses and 1,100 community institutions across the Navajo Nation.

Now I have nothing against the Navaho's. I have a Navajo Indian brother; I attended his grandfathers funeral on the reservation. They are a lovely people, they were here first, and Lord knows they have been royally shafted by our Government for generations; and I'm all for helping them out all we can.
I'm not sure that fiber-optic cabling to every Hogan is the most urgent need for the Navajo people. Notice the last paragraph of the above story where it says "affordable broadband service". I'm curios what they define as affordable; affordable to whom? So you run a fiber optic cable to this home:

Or this one:

Or these:

And lets say you even provide them a desk, dual quad-core Pentium PC, ergonomic keyboard, Hunger Games mouse pad, and surge protector; are they going to be able to afford your "affordable" internet access fee? Will it help them to deal with the rampant poverty, unemployment, alcoholism, and drug abuse that is pervasive on the reservation?

To me it would make much more sense to just give the Navajo nation the $32 million dollars and let them decide how best to use it. Those that feel that their most immediate need is blazing fast fiber-optic internet access can go for it, and those that would rather buy groceries, clothes, and pay for education could go that route.

In fact I say give the some of this other money too:

Look, the biggest problem I have with ALL of this eliminating of deserts is this:

It's much more effective when you go to http://usdebtclock.org/ and watch those numbers count up like the hundredths of a second clock at a bobsled race.

With a total US Debt of over 55 trillion*, why, WHY, is the Government spending money to build grocery stores, and run fiber optic cable to hogans? This is why people are holding Tea Parties.

* If you had a stack of 55 trillion dollar bills and paid out one bill a second it would take roughly 104 million, 642 thousand, 313 and a half years to get to the bottom of the stack. That's if the stack wasn't growing of course.

Because every fat kid has an iPhone

2010-03-16T10:40:00.001-07:00

Have you ever seen a fat soldier?

2010-02-25T06:52:00.000-08:00

I've been re-thinking my position on food deserts. In 1916 there was only one grocery store. Today there are an estimated 220,381. That's clearly not sufficient progress because there are still food deserts - hundreds of thousands that live more than a mile away from a supermarket. That's why Michelle Obama has called for billions of dollars in government assistance - so we can build more - so that people have easier access to fresh fruit and produce - so we won't be so morbidly obese.

But as brilliant as the Obama's are I think they might be a little short-sighted. If you make sure everyone has a grocery store within a mile of their home, they are still going to have to leave their house... perhaps even have to walk to the store. Also, its possible they may still not make the best food choices, passing up the fresh fruit and produce isle and heading straight to the Captain Crunch and diet Coke isles. It seems clear to me that the better solution would be to deliver the proper nutrition right to the American peoples homes. This could save the postal service which has been steadily losing revenue thanks to e-mail, blogs and facebook.

Think of all the jobs that would be created to prepare, package and deliver the food. Think of how healthy we would all be, eating the correct recommended daily allowances of vitamins and minerals, given in the proper proportions. Think of the money we'd save by not having to build a bunch more grocery stores. Think of all the current fitness centers the government could create out of all the old grocery stores. Think of the gas we would save by not driving to the store - thus saving the planet (particularly the dolphins and baby seals) from global warming. Think of the money we would save on HEALTH CARE! Think about how you wouldn't have to think about what you are going to prepare for dinner each day. See how many problems would be solved by having Meals, Ready to Eat delivered right to our door. God bless America!

We have a BIG problem people!!

2010-02-24T08:44:00.001-08:00

Apparently there is a huge problem in America, that until recently I was completely unaware of. But thanks to the Obamas this problem is finally coming to light, and getting the attention and government funding it deserves. So what is this new threat to our American way of life?

FOOD DESERTS!

That's right food deserts. Did you know that in America there are a lot, and I mean a LOT of people that live more than one mile away from a grocery store? As a matter of fact, I am one of these people. I am living in a food desert and didn't even realize it. How could my government have let this happen? I'm certain this is yet another problem that was inherited from the Bush administrations.

"More than 23 million Americans, including 6.5 million children, live in low-income urban and rural neighborhoods that are more than a mile from a supermarket. These communities, where access to affordable, quality, and nutritious foods is limited, are known as food deserts" [1]

Thankfully Michelle Obama is on top of the situation. She has started a new campaign against childhood obesity.

What is she going to do about the problem? For starters:

"For healthier schools, the First Lady cites reauthorization of the Child Nutrition Act calling for a federal spending increase of $1 billion more a year for 10 years, as well as adherence to the Institute of Medicine's nutrition standards within several years."[1]

Yes, 10 Billion more tax payer dollars to make sure your kids eat healthier in school. That money could be used to fund vital programs such as this:

But that's only a small part of the plan. If we are going to solve childhood obesity the first step is to give families easier access to more food. And if you have to travel more than a mile to get to a grocery store, that's too far.

"As part of the President’s proposed FY 2011 budget, the Administration announced a new program – the Healthy Food Financing Initiative -- a partnership between the U.S. Departments of Treasury, Agriculture and Health and Human Services which will invest $400 million a year to provide innovative financing to bring grocery stores to underserved areas"
"the Administration will work to eliminate food deserts across the country within seven years."[1]

So now our tax dollars will help to build more grocery stores, and I just can't wait to get mine. There aren't many open lots within a mile of my house, but I'm thinking they could knock down one of the senior centers in the area. I mean those are only benefiting a handful of people who are about to die anyway, while there are hundreds of people with obese children in my community who NEED to be closer to a grocery store.

If you are wondering if YOU live in a food desert a website has been created (thanks for your generous tax donation) so you can check it out. Face it, you are just not smart enough to know if you live within a mile of a grocery store.

Can I just divert for a moment to say how grateful I am to have such brilliant minds to make decisions for me. I am reminded constantly of how smart they are. Here's a couple examples; first from the first lady herself from a speech she gave at UCLA:

"Barack, as Oprah said, is one of the most brilliant men you will meet in our lifetime"
"Barack will never allow you to go back to your lives as usual, uninvolved, uninformed." [2]

Well I is so glad I doesn't have to go back to my old uniformed life.

And from Bill Mahr -joking, but totally serious:

Jay Leno: Well let me ask you, everybody is talking about the new Obama. What do you make of this?
Bill Mahr: Yes, well, you know what? I get nervous when politicians do this, when they want to be more populist. You know, I mean, he's not a populist. He's an elitist, that's what I like about him. He's smarter than the rest of us.

Folks, these people are brilliant - do not trust yourselves to make uninvolved and uninformed decisions for yourself or your families - leave it to the professionals, the smart ones, those who can only have your best interests at heart - your politicians.

Anyway, back to the food desert map. Here it is:

http://maps.ers.usda.gov/FoodAtlas/

Looking at the options on the left, I can see that grocery stores are clearly not the only problem the government can help us with. There are also fast food deserts, restaurant deserts, convenience store deserts, car deserts, farmers market deserts, and recreation and fitness facility deserts. I feel parched people. How long am I have to going to wait for the government to build a fitness center, grocery store, and farmers market (I already gots them other things) within a mile of my home, AND give me a second car (sos I don't have to take da bus) and my thirst can finally be quenched?

Judging from the map it's gonna be a while for Utah because it seems that the biggest deserts are in southern California and southern Arizona. Apparently those who are stranded in the desert the most are the illegal aliens. They had to cross a big desert (and a big fence) to get here; we should make sure that they didn't come all that way just to end up in another desert - a food desert. Also think of all those people living in San Diego who are suffering because they have to travel more than a mile to get to a decent grocery store. Think of all the gas they wasted - gas that could have taken them to Sea World instead.

Get behind this people... my community is waiting!

1. http://www.letsmove.gov/accessing/index.html
2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0Gl8aMOpcg
3. http://www.thatsfit.com/2010/02/23/michelle-obama-obesity-plan-ratings/?icid=main|main|dl3|link4|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.thatsfit.com%2F2010%2F02%2F23%2Fmichelle-obama-obesity-plan-ratings%2F

Is this why you let me in your book club?

2010-02-10T09:22:00.000-08:00

Anyone need some Spam?

2010-01-19T08:36:00.000-08:00

...cuz I can hook you up. I'm on a first name basis with a lot of spammers:

In other news... I went skiing for the first time this season on Saturday. YAHOOOO!
C & I went to the International Auto Expo yesterday and tried to imagine what our next car might look like. I'm thinking it might look kinda like a box, but with a USB port in it.
We also went to linner (or is it lupper?) at the Texas Roadhouse, and stuffed ourselves on fresh-from-the-oven yeast rolls before our fall-off-the-bone baby back ribs, and juicy sirloin steaks even got to the table. Thank's for the long weekend Dr. King!

Reaping the rewards of hours of hard labor.

2010-01-12T08:20:00.000-08:00

1/12/10

Dear Mark:

We are writing regarding The Real Simple “Daily Finds” Holiday Sweepstakes that you entered. It was held from November 16 – December 15, 2009. Your entry was selected by our company (an independent judging organization) from among over 373,000 entries received, and has been identified as one of four (4) potential Daily Prize Winners for December 15. 2009.

The Approximate Retail Value ("ARV") of the Daily Prize for December 15, 2009 is $7 and the prize you have won is:

One (1) set of Milk Chocolate Penguins from L.A. Burdick Handmade Chocolates. TOTAL ARV: $7.

There is no cost to you whatsoever to claim this prize. You can expect to receive your prize within the next 45 days via Priority Mail.

Thank you again, on behalf of the sponsor, for your participation in The Real Simple “Daily Finds” Holiday Sweepstakes.

Christmas at Disneyland

2010-01-11T07:29:00.001-08:00

Hello blog, remember me? I'm back to try and renew our long lost friendship. By way of reaching out, I present you with this short slide show of pic's from our trip to Disneyland last month. I know it's not much... no fancy transitions, no captions, no snappy timing of pictures to music... but hey, it's the thought that counts right? I'm not expecting us to become friends again over night. I know a relationship as strained as ours will take time to heal. Baby steps.

Two Big B-Days!

2009-12-03T07:55:00.000-08:00

This sweet little girl turns 18 years old today!

And this cute little guy turns 16 tomorrow!

Two big milestone birthdays for two amazing young adults.

Jennifer is beautiful, talented, smart, and funny. One of the things I love most about her is how easy going she is. She takes adversity in stride, and doesn't let life's struggles and trials get her down. She'll spend her birthday today at the USC Medical Center getting some more tests done related to her NF1, but when I talked to her this morning she was very happy and positive.
I love her self confidence and bravery. I have never seen her shirk from any challenge. She is not afraid to get in front of an audience... something she definitely didn't inherit from me. She is pretty fearless, and has begged me to let her get on thrill rides that I was too scared to get on myself.
She is very kind hearted and likes to volunteer and work with kids. She has put in a lot of hours at various charity events recently. She's a huge help to Samantha with Jonas. She wants to work towards being a guidance councilor, and I think that career choice would suit her perfectly.
I can't believe my little girl is 18 already. I'm proud of her, and I love her more than I can say.

Zachary is also one great kid. One of the things I love most about Zach is how responsible he is. He is very low maintenance. He gets himself up every morning, does his own laundry, cleans his room on a regular basis without being asked, and is the first one out the door for church every Sunday. We just never have to hound him about getting ready, doing chores, getting his homework done, being home at a certain time or anything.
He requires very little to be content. He doesn't crave designer clothes, or fancy restaurants, or even expensive toys, and he always expresses gratitude for what he has. He's a boy who loves his mother and is not afraid to show it. Last night Cherie and I were going out to a BYU Christmas Dinner and Zach was playing DS games with a couple of his friends. We were about to walk out the door when Zach said "WAIT... I'm just about to beat these guys and I can't let you leave without a proper goodbye". A few seconds later he beat them, and jumped up and gave his mom a hug... in front of his friends even. That's a good boy!
Zach is also very funny and keeps me laughing. He's a hard worker and very responsible with his money. He's generous and loyal to his friends. He's a peacemaker. He's concerned about kids who are picked on or left out. Really, I couldn't be prouder of this young man.

So happy birthday Jenny and Zach! Now that you are 16 and 18 what are you going to do next? I know.... let's go to Disneyland!!

Some Restrictions May Apply

2009-10-28T10:20:00.000-07:00

So if you haven't heard I've been entering on-line sweepstakes lately. Quite a few actually. It's kind of like an obsession. No really... HELP ME!!

It started after I found a little site called MouseSavers.com. It's about all things Disney of course, and they have a page that lists all known currently running sweepstakes that can win you a trip to Disneyland or DisneyWorld. So I started entering those, 'cause I love Disneyland. Then I started entering a few others here and there, and finding other sweepstakes sites, and before I knew it, I was entering 100's of sweepstakes a day.

Being the computer nerd that I am I have some nice macro's I've created that automates most of my entries. Shhhh, don't tell the sweepstakes people... they don't like that kind of thing. I have one macro that is almost 3,000 lines of code long. Still, it takes way too much of my free time, and I'd like to quit, but I just can't. I might win something. Hey it could happen! In fact I have already won several things, including but not limited to:

Several free phone calls from a Disney Princess (gave to a neighbor with little kids)
Starbucks gift card (they have hot chocolate don't they)
Hannah Montana Video Game for the PS2 (it's still in the shrink wrap)
$20 gift card for the Home Shopping Network (bought some reading glasses)
A bikini (no, I haven't tried it on)
$25 Buckle gift card (Haven't used it yet. Do they sell anything that doesn't have a skull on it?)
A salt cellar from Morton Salt (It's actually kind of nice - pretty wood)

And my latest major award...

Yes it's a $5 gift card to Macaroni Grill. I got TWO of them in fact!

Since you can't see the fine print at the bottom, I'll let you know what it says:

Some Restrictions may apply.

Of course... have you ever won anything that didn't have some restrictions?

Coupon must be presented to server.

Duh.

Alcohol not included

Personally I don't care. But maybe a drinker out there can tell me... does it matter to you that they will only take the $5 off your meal, and not your drinks? I mean it's $5 off either way, right?

Limit one certificate per visit.

Understandable. They don't want us blowing our whole $10 savings at one time. That could put them right out of business.

Cannot be combined with any other package or offer.

Again, if I were to use my $5 certificate combined with say, a 10% off coupon... bye bye Macaroni Grill.

So that's it...

OH, WAIT... there is one more little teeny tiny restriction down there in the fine print...

Valid at Niagara Falls location only.

LEAPIN' LIPIDS!!

2009-10-08T09:40:00.000-07:00

Blood doesn't lie people... Markie is officially healthier. BYU has a wellness program. They have challenges, and give awards, yadda yadda. They also take our blood every year. It just so happened that they took my blood this year on the same day as they did last year - exactly 365 days apart. I thought that was kinda cool. What was cooler was the results.

As my blog fans are aware I made a resolution to lose some weight this year, and no one was more shocked than me that I actually did it. Over 40 pounds in fact. Now in all honesty I haven't lost any weight in several months... but I haven't gained any either. I have dramatically slacked off on exercise over the past couple months. I have plenty of excuses for this...

1) they changed the schedule at the BYU gym so that classes are now being taught during the lunch hour that I used to work out in.
2) My quiet summer with no students is over, and I've been much busier at work.
3) A student and professor that I was playing racquetball with both sustained foot injuries and haven't been able to play for a couple months.
4) Cherie has been laid up with health prob's, and now is recovering from surgery. (I was playing racquetball with her two or three days a week).
5) The fall TV lineup has started.

I'm hoping that once I can get back into a good exercise routine I can lose those last 20 pounds or so I'd like to get rid of. Still, I was very excited to see the results of my blood test today, and had to share them with the world. So here they are:

Now I'm no nurse; I have no idea what a lipid is, and I don't really understand what these numbers mean or even if they are statistically significant. But even I can see that in every category my numbers have clearly improved. Particularly that Happy-Dolphin-Loving good cholesterol which went up 10 points, and that Low-Down-Lily-livered bad cholesterol which dropped a whopping 17 points! Snaps for Me!!

Calling All Apps!!

2009-09-21T16:23:00.000-07:00

Thanks to my sweet honey, and a very strange and fortuitous sequence of events, I am now the proud owner of an IPod Touch!! So I am sending a shout-out asking you to tell me your favorite Apps. I haven't even turned it on yet, and have no idea what it comes with, but once I do I have a feeling I'm going to need some apps, and need them quick. I also have a feeling this could lead to some serious texting... eeeek!

It's Ginormous!!

2009-08-29T15:45:00.000-07:00

That's my Cougar!

2009-08-27T14:12:00.000-07:00

This picture was in today's Daily Universe.

The Other Thing We Did

2009-07-31T12:08:00.000-07:00

The other thing we did last weekend was go to the Utah Olympic Park. We went there after hanging out with Cat Deeley. It was kinda cool - We watched the bobsleders for a while. We didn't do it ourselvers onacuz it's $60 each and lasts for about a 90 seconds.

We also watched the kids do ski jumps into the pool. We found out however, that on Saturday they were having a big event with the BIG BOYS doing extreme inverted aerial maneuvers, and also the loooong ski jumpers would be out; plus a band, bbq, etc. So we went back up on Saturday. It was amazing. These guys can FLY!!

More Info...

2009-07-25T19:00:00.000-07:00

So yesterday was Pioneer Day - another great reason to live in Utah, an extra holiday! It was also the day for the Salt Lake City tryouts for season 6 of So You Think You Can Dance. Cherie & I decided to go check out the spectacle. We had very low expectations. I pictured an enormous crowd, a parking nightmare, and very little chance of seeing any of the cast.

As it turned out the crown wasn't very large, and we got a parking spot right in front of the entrance to the theater:

This picture of Cat was taken by Cherie out the front window of the car:

We strolled up and down the line taking pictures of the interesting people there, and talking to a few of them. We talked to one young man who's fiance, a BYU graduate, was inside auditioning. He said she was really good. Her name is Alyse (sounds like Uh-Lease). We're hoping she makes it.

We posed for a few pictures standing in line, but we weren't really "in line", and we never entered the theater. Apparently not even family or friends were allowed inside. this was an open casting call, and the judges weren't present. Only the very best, and of course the very worst, would be called back for auditions before the judges today. And, no... we didn't go back today to try and get a glimpse of Mary Murphy.

Somebody important came out for interviews yesterday and I'm curious who it is. If you recognize the guy in the white shirt on my slide show in the "Behind The Scenes" section, let me know. My guess is he's a producer, or executive of some sort.

Cat Deely came out a few times in the 45 minutes or so that we were there. Once to give a brief interview to some reporter types, once to film a short segment with the crowd, and once more to hop into a limo and take off.

I always pictured Cat as a giantess. She looks so tall on TV. But she was just regular sized; kinda short compared to me. I guess most dancers must just be very short people who make her look tall in comparison. She was very cute and bubbly like on TV while giving her interview and filming her segments, but she didn't spend any time shaking hands, or posing for pictures. She was all business.

Also, the personal assistants, and body guards surrounding her were not very nice or bubbly at all. They didn't like people taking pictures and tried to keep us from doing it. I even got a warning not to post my pictures on-line - shaaaw right.

Anyway, it was a lot of fun and we have a few people that we will be looking for when the SLC auditions air in September. After hanging out with Cat we went on to do something else very cool and fun... but that's another blog post. :o)

EEEEEEEEK.... WE SAW A CAT!!!

2009-07-24T22:02:00.000-07:00

4th of July and a Jonas Photo Shoot

2009-07-05T19:11:00.000-07:00

We had our annual 4th of July BBQ and fireworks at our house yesterday. Cherie's family from South Jordan joined us and of course we had Jen, Sam, Ly and Jonas with us. It was a beautiful warm night - perfect for some pyrotechnics!

After the party Sam, Ly & Jenny talked me into staying up for a very late night game of Zombies (a new game Ly picked up for his birthday). We played until almost 2 am. I was glad I got to spend some last minute time with them before they headed back to socal this morning.

I couldn't let Jonas go without one more photo shoot - this time during his breakfast.

Yesterdays Fun

2009-07-02T07:51:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon we took the kids to The Living Planet Aquarium in Sandy. It's not very big as aquariums go, but for a state with no bordering ocean, it wasn't bad.

It was large enough to house a shark tank, and a touch pool where you could feel the sting rays.

After the aquarium visit, we went to the open house for the new Oquirrh Mountain Temple in South Jordan. I didn't take any shots there, so here are some pirated pic's:

It was a beautiful Temple, and very cool to stand by it and see the other South Jordan Temple, and the new Draper Temple not far away. Hmmm, can you see the Salt Lake Temple from there too? I didn't think to look for it. I doubt it. But still... cool to be able to stand in one spot and see several temples.

Birthday Couple

2009-07-01T08:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we celebrated Sam & Ly's birthday's. It was Lysander's actual B-Day; Samantha's is on the 9th.

Sammy has no excuse to not read the book of the month now!

More Summer Fun

2009-06-30T09:37:00.000-07:00

Last week Jenny and I had to take a little trip to Salt Lake for some more tests at UVU Medical Center, and we decided to make a day of it. We went to the Salt Lake Zoo, and then out to lunch at Rumbi Island Grill.

We were there for Giraffe feeding time:

It was a fun day. I love giraffes, I love Rumbi Island Grill rice bowls, and I especially loved the promising test results that Jenny got.

On Saturday we went up Emigration Canyon to a cool campground where Cherie's side of the family was having a reunion. They had lots of fun activities including a very challenging ropes course.

Here I am crossing a high wire:

...and flying across a zip-line:

I spent several hours standing on this platform helping transfer people from one safety harness system to another. I was happy to get back on solid ground again.

These is my girls:

They also had a nice fish pond well stocked with trout.

I caught four, kept three - and took them home and cooked them up. Yummy.

Yesterday Samantha, Lysander and Jonas came to spend the week with us. We took Jonas to the park in the evening, and gave Sam & Ly some quiet time to take a test for their on-line Statistics course.

I don't know this kid, but I had to snag a picture:

Of course there's no one cuter than this little guy:

One Huge Catch-Up Post with TONS of Pics!

2009-06-19T12:56:00.001-07:00

Guests
So when last I blogged we had just had some guests over for the weekend, and had fun at Liberty Land. Here are are few pics from the place where "The Rush Never Ends".

We also had more guest coming to attend two weddings a few days apart. They were these great people - Cherie's brother Larry, his wife Nancy, and 4 of their kids.

And this fun couple - Larry's daughter Natalie, and her hubby Clint (and also their baby Ryan - not pictured).

Weddings
The first wedding was for this cute couple:

This is Cherie's niece Julia and her husband Ryan Nielsen.

yup, they're twitterpated.

With Julia's parents, Connie & Paul Smith:

This is one super fun nest of people, with no bad eggs. I feel very lucky to be able to hang with them once in a while, and be a part of moments like this.

After the wedding they had a luncheon at the Lion House

I LOVE this place. Great food, great history, and great people to have lunch with.

I may have gotten a little carried away with dessert. I have been dieting for long time.

Then in the evening they had a beautiful outdoor reception

Julia and her brothers:

What her family will look like in 8 or 9 years?

These two are still twitterpated also:

The second wedding was for these beautiful people:

This is Chris and Cassandra (Cassi). Notice the gorgeous dress that you helped her win with your votes!

With my in-laws Earl and Joyce Clark:

And with her favorite Aunt and Uncle:

Cherie with her sister Lisa:

And us hanging out on Temple grounds waiting for another awesome luncheon at The Lion House!

We went up to the observation deck at the church office building:

Arizona
A few days after the wedding festivities we headed to Arizona to drop off Zach for the summer. We had fun visiting with Lisa and C's daughter Colleen, and her hubby David. We played Bananagrams and Zarahemla, and I finished the SR bookclub book of the month. Sorry, I guess neither Cherie or I took any pics in AZ.

California
Next we headed to Anaheim where we got an amazing deal on a very nice hotel thanks to Priceline. We got two day park-hopper passes to the Magic Kingdom and Cherie and I walked a combined 122,139 steps over both days there.

There were a couple things that weren’t so magical about the magic kingdom this time. First of all, several of the major rides were broken down most of the time we were there. At one time we had fast passes for Space Mountain, Thunder Mountain, and Indiana Jones, and every one of them was broken down. At C.A. Grizzly Rapids kept breaking down, including twice while we were on it.

Disneyland was also VERY crowded, but we were still able to work the fast pass system to our usual perfection and had a great time and still didn’t stand in any lines longer than 10 minutes or so. We got our fix of Tower of Terror, California Screamin’ and the Maliboomer to last us for at least another six months so it was all good.

Paddling a canoe around Tom Sawyers Island:

A VERY funny river cruise captain. I love it when you get a good one!

I scored two Mardi Gras bead necklaces for my sweet honey.

Did you know they are re-modeling California Adventure. One of the new features will be a water show like Disneyland's Fantasmic. Here is the drained lake and the lights and jets they are installing for the new show.

The major disappointment had nothing to do with the rides. I have been eating and loving Disneyland clam chowder since I was a kid. We used to order bowls of it in the Blue Bayou restaurant back when it was like $1.50 a bowl. I was super excited when they started serving it in sourdough bowls at the little walk-up window outside the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. It’s one of the reasons I love Disneyland so much and look forward to my next visit with such anticipation.

This time when I ordered the clam chowder I noticed immediately that it looked a little different. Then I tasted it and… uuugh. Yucky. I was shocked. Stunned. I went back to the window and asked them what this cruel trick was, hoping that it was just a random occurrence; but was told that Disneyland has changed the recipe, and this is what it will be like from now on.

I am SO bummed out you gize. It’s really not good. They put a bunch of rosemary and some other weird spices in there so that that’s all you can taste. It’s like no other clam chowder I’ve ever had, and it sux. I need some help to organize a campaign to bring back the old recipe. Maybe we can get Jimmy Falon involved.

After two days at Disneyland we headed on to Bakersfield, but first stopped at a couple favorite spots. First was the Griffith Observatory.

It's the first time we've been there since the big restoration and it looks fantastic.

Did you know that this is where Cherie and I got engaged? Yep, right here... in this spot:

Then we decided to head up the coast to a place where we knew we could get some chowder we could count on – the Splash Café in Pismo beach. They still have the same creamy delicious recipe that has won them major awards for decades, and it costs way less than the slop Disneyland is selling now. Also when they take the core out of the bread bowl they butter and toast it for you. Not only that but for an extra buck you can get it topped with shrimp and crab meat.... mmmmmm.

Then it was on to Bakersfield to visit my mother, sister, daughters and grandson. Jonas is so cute and huggable. I wish I could have brought him back with us. We also go to meet and hang out with Jenny’s boyfriend Ralph. He’s a very nice young man, and we had fun playing bananagrams, and the Mexican Train game. Lysander was working both days so I never got to see him, but they are coming in a few weeks to pick up Jenny.

Me & Sammy:

Jenny & Ralph

My grandson Jonas!

Whew... that post was exhausting. You're welcome.

One Awesome Holiday Weekend!

2009-05-26T08:08:00.000-07:00

We had a fantastic holiday weekend!! We took our two guests Lisa, and Kailin to a new fun-park in Lehi. It's kinda mainly for kids but BYU offered us free passes so we decided to be kids for a day. We had a blast playing:
Miniature golf - I won.
Bumber boats - mine didn't work so I had to stay on the side and watch the girls gang up on Zach and totally soak him - very entertaining
Go-carts - I won again. While waiting our turn three racers came off the starting line at the same time and at the first turn came to a dead stop. Turns out the track was not wide enough for three go-carts to go side by side and they jammed together so tight that the attended couldn't un-stick them. I hopped over the fence to lend a hand, but even the two of us couldn't free them. Finally with 4 men tugging with all our might we were able to unjam them and get them going again.
Air hockey - Kailin was the champ
And... the funnest game of Laser Tag ever. As we put on our vests and checked out our equipment everyone started calling out the character name they were given (it shows up in the display screen on the laser gun). Most of the names were things like Venom, Dark Angel, Destroyer, Fang, etc. But when Zach checked out his name it was... Princess. Of course we teased him about it relentlessly the entire weekend. By the way, Cherie came out on top in this game, beating all 21 other competitors. That's my girl!!

One more cool thing happened while we were there. We got a free raffle ticket from a local radio station as we came in the entrance. They gave out prizes all day long, and then right before we left they gave out the Grand Prize, and Cherie had the winning ticket! The prize included all the prizes they had already given away - a bunch of tickets to all kinds of things like the Aquarium, sporting events, and a David Archuleta concert - plus a free Snow Board. We're still waiting for them to call and tell us how to get our snow board, but we were pretty excited. Not only did we get in free, but walked away with a bunch of free stuff. NICE!!

We loved having Kailin with us and we miss her already. I hope she comes and visits us again soon.

Yesterday (Memorial Day) we joined a bunch of Cherie's family at a park in Big Cottonwood Canyon for a picnic and rock climbing. It was absolutely perfect weather, and so incredibly gorgeous up there.

Here is a view of the Salt Lake valley from the top of a little mountain we climbed.

And here we are.

Zach is getting very tall. He is well taller than his mom now.

This is the rock face we climbed.

Here I am climbing...

and climbing...

and making it to the top...

and coming back down again.

I don't think I would have tried this 4 months and almost 40 pounds ago. It felt great!!

Just a plain old update

2009-05-22T14:48:00.000-07:00

I don't have anything fun to blog about but Like ManicMandy, I'm tired of looking at the same old entry; so here's my boring update:

We have guests on their way to our house at this very moment. I love guests! Cherie's sister Lisa is staying with us for a few days. She is here for her nieces' weddings (more on that later). I think she's a lot of fun, but I discovered that she really wanted to stay at her other sister's house, 'cause that's where all the "fun" people are staying. In fact she's moving over there as soon as the "fun" people arrive, so I'm now in a quandry.... Do I try and compete with the "fun" people and try and get her to stay, or just give up and sprinkle itching powder on her bed sheets?
Also a couple of my cousin Vickie's kids are staying the weekend while one of them gets ready to enter Snow College.
Then on Monday we will have Cherie's brother and his family staying for a week. They're a good size bunch, so it might get a little crazy in our little house. Crazy is the opposite of boring. I like crazy.
Next week two of Cherie's nieces (Julia and Cassandra) are getting married, a couple days apart, in the Salt Lake temple. They are both having luncheons in the Lion House. YUMMMM! I'm lucky to have amazing nieces on both sides of the family, and I absolutely love Julia and Cassi. They are both very funny, smart, and gorgeous. I hope their fiances know what lucky guys they are.
The following week we head to AZ to drop off Zach for the summer and spend a couple days visiting family there, and maybe doing a little late-night skinny dipping in the In-Laws pool while they're out of town.
Then.... WE'RE GOING TO DISNEYLAND!! Cherie just got an unexpected inheritance check in the mail - not a ton of money, but enough to send us to the Magic Kingdom for a couple days. Have I mentioned that I love Disneyland? Yeah... I'm excited.
Then we continue on to Bakersfield to see My mom and sis who will have just gotten back from China; Samantha, Lysander, and the cutest grandson ever (Jonas); and Jennifer who we'll take with us back to Utah for a few weeks. The doc's have decided to hold off on chemo and re-evaluate Jennifer while she's here. Hopefully she will show some improvement and she can skip the chemo.
Samantha and Ly are thinking about coming for a visit and to pick up Jenny around the 4th of July. I hope they can make it, but if not I'll make a quick trip to bako to drop her off myself.
Since Jenny is only staying a few weeks, and since Zach will be gone for 8 weeks, Cherie and I will be empty nesters for a few weeks. We'll miss the kids, but we'll definately take advantage of the alone time; maybe do some hiking, go to some outdoor concerts, see a couple blockbuster movies. I love summer!
As for my weight loss goals, I'm still working my way down the BMI chart. It's going much slower, but I have been working out a lot more and building lots of muscle. No one's gonna kick sand in my face at the beach.

Finally... So You Think You Can Dance!!

A Support Group of One

2009-05-04T13:47:00.000-07:00

So as you may recall I started a support group for my elite caste of friends and family who still do not have iPhones; party because iPhone people are kinda snobby, with comments like:

"I pity you. I wish you could be as happy as me." - Jenny Esp
"Oh it is sooo sweet because the iphone automatically does that" - Memzy

Then there is their annoying Quordy'ing, screen-shot posts, and "sent from my iPhone" messages. Here are a few quotes from my supporters:

"Thanks for reaching out to those of us in need" - Flem
"Like we need that information for any reason" - Katie
"I feel your pain! I think they do it on purpose" - Cristin

... and partly because we secretly wish we could have our own iPhone and be snobs too.

Since its creation I have seen my support group get smaller and smaller as one by one my supporters have deserted me for the sake of technology. Flem.... Katie... even my own big sister who can barely use a computer got one.

Take a close look at this picture from my last post:

What do all these girls have in common? - iPhones. And there they are merrily texting away right in front of me - and voting.... for ADAM!! ARRRRGGGHHH!

But wait.... one of these girls doesn't have an iPhone. CRISTIN... my beloved niece Cristin... still iPhone free. Here is a comment from Cristin when I formed my support group:

"Can I be co-president??? I can use my ghetto phone to text you info..."

So, last night I am happily chatting with the SmartRemarks book club members when I read this comment from Landee:

"Cristin... you can just listen straight from your new iPhone!!!!!"

No... it can't be... my Co-President?... the only other person at the bar (tavern) without an iPhone? Cristin?? NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

It's true. She verified it herself. I have never felt so all alone. She has asked for my forgiveness. Oh, Cristin, Cristin, Cristin.... there is nothing to forgive. I love you and I'm happy for you. You only did what I would have done if the choice were given to me. But, you will now forevermore be part of that group. You'll be texting, Quordy'ing, GPS'ing, snapping photos, and posting them right from your phone. And I will remain alone... an outsider. It's a sad sad day for Markie.

American Idol Night

2009-05-01T07:54:00.001-07:00

The Accident

2009-05-01T07:51:00.000-07:00

Albion Seven

2009-05-01T07:33:00.001-07:00

A New Toddler Dancer?

2009-04-22T08:21:00.001-07:00

The birth of a new baby was announced in our Ward on Sunday. Her name?...
Megan Joy.

To My New BFF's:

2009-04-17T08:09:00.000-07:00

After listening to an incredible podcast, I feel compelled to dedicate a post to a couple of new BFF's. First let me stress that I'm a male, I'm straight, I'm almost 50, and I'm very happily married... but I LOVE these two girls! One of them I have never met, and the other I met briefly, by some extraordinarily random chance.

Tiff/Tiffany/Landee/Landeelu:

I first learn about Landee from her hilarious and pithy comments left on the blog posts of several of my nieces. It leads me to eventually start stalking her own blog which is also always very entertaining. She joins the Smart Remarks Book Club (where she always leaves "smart remarks"), imprints on Jenny ExtraSpecialPowers (doesn't everyone?), and then recommends an amazing book that I don't believe will ever be topped in book club history. I hope to meet Landeelu Landerson some day, because she cracketh me up, and I now consider her another one of my amazing nieces.

Lee/LeeAnn/Queso/Flem:

I also learn about Flem from her very funny and smart blog posts and comments. The last time we were in Bakersfield the water went out at my sisters house and Emily W. allowed us to come and use her shower. There I learned about the connection -- that Tiff is a cousin of Emily, and that the three of them were roomies at BYU (I can only imagine the crazy stuff that went on in that dorm room). Then by amazing random chance, Flem drops by while traveling from Santa Barbara to can't-remember-where, and I actually get to visit with her for a while. She has some remarkable smarts and talents, and she also recommended an amazing book for the book club, which I thouroughly enjoyed.

A couple months ago Tiff started appearing on a podcast, giving her critique, and run-down of American Idol. She summed up the A.I. phonemenon on her first podcast appearance when she said that American Idol is like "The Great Equilizer...you can talk to people from our parents generation, down to my beehives, down to my 6 year old... everbody knows about it, everybody's got an opinion on it... I love it because you have an awkward conversation with somebody, you bring up American Idol and that's it, you're in." Cherie and I were at a college dinner recently, where we sat at a table with several stuffy professors, and a retiree. I wondered what common ground we would find to talk about, when someone brought up American Idol, and suddenly we were all involved in stimulating conversation.

In the last podcast Landee and Queso joined forces to discuss A.I. and I LOVED it!! I hope they continue to do that regularly. Putting these two smart and funny girls together moves mountains, and makes me wish I knew them back when they were students at the Y. Again, I can only imagine the fun times they must have had. Not only that, but imagine my joy when they actually mentioned ME on the podcast; ok, not by name, but they referred to a comment I left on Landee's latest idol run-down. Yeah, that's pretty much all it takes to make my day.

So there they are, my new BFF's Tiff & Lee. Thank you for daring to dance in the path of greatness!!

April Showers?

2009-04-16T07:46:00.000-07:00

The view from our front porch this morning:

Ooops!

2009-04-07T08:45:00.000-07:00

BYU pulled all copies of the school paper, The Daily Universe, from the racks yesterday... but not before I grabbed a copy. This picture with the attached caption was on the front page:

I scanned it and provided the red underline. You're welcome.

Can Somebody Explain This To Me?

2009-04-06T07:51:00.000-07:00

Here is the summary of my diet this week from The Daily Plate:

The blue line is my Calorie limit (less that 1700 calories per day - yeah, rough). The red line is the actual calories consumed. The green line is my net calories after subtracting the calories I burned through exercise.
As you can plainly see, I exercised EVERY day last week. On EVERY day of the week I came in well under my calorie limit in net calories. Not only that, but on at least 6 of the days I even came in under the 1700 calories limit in ACTUAL calories consumed.
The results of my weigh in this morning? I GAINED 0.2 pounds!! I know that doesn't sound like much, but srsly, why should I have gained at all? Is there a doctor or nutritionist in the house that can explain it to me?
It really is very depressing to me. It's the first time since January 1st that I've GAINED weight on a weigh in. I'd like to blame it on Flem's chocolate bunny, but Jenny and Zach ate most of it, and I accounted for the chocolate rabbit's foot that I ate. In fact, there is still part of a mutilated face and tummy left uneaten - I commanded that it be gone by the time I get home from work today.
I felt like that woman on Biggest Loser must have felt; the one who lost over 80 pounds at home, then came back to the Biggest Loser campus for a week and GAINED 5 pounds.
Wazupwidat?

It's A Major Award!

2009-04-04T09:24:00.001-07:00

FINAL ROUND!!

2009-04-03T11:11:00.000-07:00

WE MADE IT TO THE FINAL TWO COUPLES !!

Thank you for voting-!!!

WE ARE SO BLESSED TO HAVE SUCH SUPPORT FROM OUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY.

http://www.kzzp.com/pages/matrimony-madness/

Here is the thing! Chris and I need you ALL to send this to everyone you have in your address book!
PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO VOTE each day!
Remember to vote Fri, Sat, Sun, and on Monday morning until 8am with up to 10 E-mail addresses.

GO GO CASSANDRA!!

2009-03-16T07:01:00.000-07:00

My awesome niece (on Cherie's side) Cassandra, aka Cassi is getting married and is in a wedding contest. You can vote for her HERE. The rules are:

* You may vote once per valid email address per day.
* IP addresses are stored to avoid fake email addresses and vote falsifying.
* Email or vote falsifying is grounds for immediate disqualification.

I love Cassi and I'd love to see her win so hit my LINK and send her a vote. The round one votes end Wednesday (18th) at 8 a.m. so be sure and vote today and tomorrow (and Wed. before 8 if you can) - but just one vote per day.

When you click the LINK just enter your e-mail and then select Chris & Cassi's photo (see above) and click "Submit Your Vote".

Besides being drop dead gorgeous, Cassi is very funny... one of my favorite Cassi moments was when we were at a luncheon at the Lion House in Salt Lake; we were all sitting around a table and Cassi tried to reach for something across the table and couldn't quite get it. Before anyone could pass it to her she uttered "Go Go Gadget Arm", and then miraculously extended her arm just a little further to finally reach it.

Good luck Cassi & Chris!

A Post For The Sake Of Posting

2009-03-09T09:40:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted anything for a long time, and even though I don't have much to blog about I feel the need to post something. It's just that lately our lives have been soooo boring.
Seriously, I have nothing to write about, nothing to blog about, nothing planned.… I’m like George Castanza:

KRAMER: You're wasting your life.
GEORGE: I am not! What you call wasting, I call living! I'm living my life!
KRAMER: O.K., like what? Tell me! Do you have a job?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: You got money?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: Do you have a woman?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: Do you have any prospects?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: You got anything on the horizon?

GEORGE: Uh...no.

KRAMER: Do you have any action at all?
GEORGE: No.
KRAMER: Do you have any conceivable reason for even getting up in the morning?
GEORGE: I like to get the Daily News!

Ok, maybe not that bad. I do have a job... and a woman. But our lives right now are pretty much all about who’s gonna get kicked off of American Idol next. On the bright side, I don't have anything sad or tragic to blog about so, hey... life is good.

I do have a few little nuggets: First of all, I am still going strong on my weight loss resolution. I'm down 20 pounds people! It feels great, but I am only about a third of the way to my ultimate goal. Cherie is also doing great - even though she didn't need to lose much to begin with. She started out looking good, but now she's like chika chika Ou Ouuuu!
Secondly, I am lovin' our Utah Jazz. We finally have all players healthy, and have won 11 straight games!
And finally, I had one incredibly awesome ski day Saturday. Probably my best skiing ever. I owned that mountain. I did things that I didn't think I was capable of; skiing through the trees, skiing the super steep stuff and taking on some huge moguls. I was in the groove. I spent more time on black diamond runs than any other. The snow was great, and it was a gorgeous day. It was the last of my 5 day passes and while that's sad, it was a great day to finish out on. I may try and get in a couple more 1/2 days at Alta, or Sundance before the season is over if I can scrape up the cash.
Bailey Out.

Where, Oh Where Has My 401K Gone?

2009-02-19T14:56:00.000-08:00

Curse my math skillz. I just figured out that my 401K has lost almost $100,000.00 in value in the past year or so. It's a good thing that I am a looooong way from retiring. For those who are close to retiring or are already living off their 401K's... ouch!
Here is a graph of my 401K performance over the past several years. Thank goodness for the $800,000,000,000+ in new government spending. I'm sure that'll turn things right around.

Where, oh where has my sweet Burn-Z gone?

2009-02-11T08:07:00.000-08:00

It's been almost two months since Burn-Z left on his mission, and I haven't heard a word from him you gize. He doesn't write, he doesn't call.

The way he ages in burnt loaf years I thought he might be back from his mission already, and moving on to other things, but I don't know where he is.

So here is a Burn-Z APB. If you seen my little Cinaburn please ask him to report on his mission, and tell us what he is up to now. I miss the little poo loaf.

A tribute to an amazing product - Can you guess what it is?

2009-02-08T08:26:00.000-08:00

I have been using a product for over 30 years. It performs just as well today as it did back then. I completely expect that it will continue to perform just as well until the day I die. I never have, and never will have to do a single thing to maintain it. It is undoubtedly the most reliable thing I have ever owned or ever will own. Can you guess what it is?

Hint: I have gone for years where I used this product almost daily, and years where I never used it once. I've been using it several times a week lately.

Hint2: This product is gender neutral and used by both men and women alike, and I'm almost positive you have one or at least have had one. However, yours is useless to me, and mine is useless to you.

Still need more hints?: Yes Jenny, I have had the same one for over 30 years; about 34 years to be more precise (BTW, I'm 48). You could buy the same product today, and it hasn't changed since I got mine. You may have lost yours or can't remember how to use it, or maybe even had one that you couldn't keep. It's a common item that virtually everyone will have a need for at one time in their life or another. They may even need several of them. I have used several of them in my life, but I am really just focusing on this particular one that I have had and used for 34 years, and that virutally everyone gets at a particular time in their life.

Last clue: It is very easy to use Jenny, and very useful, but you need one key piece of information to use it or else it's useless and you might as well throw it away.

THE ANSWER: If you give up, and want to know what this product is then scroll down to my post titled "Not To Be Left Out".

A feel-good fluff piece.

2009-01-30T08:53:00.000-08:00

Ok, after that hard hitting and controversial political post, it's time for a feel-good fluff piece. My New Years resolution was to lose some weight. That's pretty much my only resolution every year and it usually lasts about 2 days. But here it is 29 days into the new year and I'm still going strong. I feel that I owe it to a great on-line tool called The Daily Plate.

When you register you can put in your age, weight, level of daily physical activity and the amount of weight you would like to gain or lose, and it spits out an estimate of the number of calories you should consume each day to achieve that goal. Then you can input your daily food intake and exercise, and it will keep track of the number of calories you have left for the day.

It also keeps track of the water you drink, and things like fat, cholesterol, sodium, fiber, etc, in case you are concerned about those things as well. It can provide lots of great pie charts and bar graphs to break down your calories and show your progress. And best of all its FREE!

Here are some screen shots of "my plate":

This is part of the main page. I have rarely found a food or restaurant that is not already in the database, but if it isn't you can create your own entry that is then available to other users as well. The foods you select are added to your own little database so you don't have to go searching for it each time. You can also create meals so you don't have to enter each individual ingredient each time.

This is the bottom of the main page showing summaries of your exercise and food intake.

Here is an example pie chart that breaks down the calories consumed that day.

Here's a bar graph showing my recommended calories, calories consumed, and net calories (takes into account the calories I burned off from exercise) for the last half of January.

And here's a graph showing cholesterol intake.

So my goal has been to never exceed the number of calories recommended and so far so good. It really hasn't been very tough either. I'm usually surprised at how many surplus calories I still have left at the end of the day. I've lost about 7 pounds since the first, and I still feel as motivated as I did at that beginning.

In other news... tomorrow's my birfday, so what am I gonna do? Go skiing of course! Then I was going to go on a date with my wife to P.F. Chang's for some Orange Peel Shrimp, until I looked it up on The Daily Plate and discovered that that one dish alone has 1070 Calories and 60 grams of fat!

So, do you have a recommendation for a great meal at a nice restaurant that won't require me to fast for the rest of the day and/or require an angioplasty afterwords?

I Did The Math

2009-01-30T08:11:00.000-08:00

**WARNING - POLITICS AHEAD **
***READ AT YOUR OWN RISK***

I did the math -
President Obama's proposed economic stimulus package is nearing 900 billion dollars. The estimated population of the US is 305,555,487. I divided the money in the package by the population and discovered that it comes out to $2,945.46 for every man woman and child in America. Why don't they just send us each a check? For Cherie and I and our two dependents that would amount to $11,781.84. With that money we would buy a second car. That would help the automobile company that we bought the car from and thus stimulate the economy right?

If they give billions of dollars to the auto companies it may help them avoid immediate bankruptcy, but I still wouldn't have the money to buy one of their cars, so they're still going to go bankrupt. We have already seen how corporations who are being handed billions of dollars are wasting that money - giving multi-million dollar bonuses to upper management employees, spending millions to redecorate their offices, and taking extravagant retreats.

What's even worse is that the stimulus package money is not just tagged for bailing out wall street, banks, mortgage companies, and the US auto industry, but is being used for more wasteful government spending. Things like $335 million in funding for education on sexually transmitted diseases, $650 million for digital TV coupons, $200 million worth of contraceptives to low-income families, and $20 million to re-sod the National Mall in D.C. (the last two were apparently dropped after the house vote). In all there is over $550 billion in new government spending on things that are not likely to create jobs or stimulate anything but more national debt.

It's not surprising since Obama and Biden were two of the worst pork barrel spenders in the senate. The only senator, democratic or republican, I am aware of who never spent a dime on pork barrel projects was John McCain.

Now I don't really suggest they send us each a check. Our national debt is already ten and a half TRILLION dollars, and growing by an average of 3.3 billion dollars per day. So giving away 900 billion dollars of money they don't have is just getting us in even deeper doo doo. The only way to even hope of getting out of this hole is to let us keep more of the money we earn, let businesses keep more of the money they earn so they can hire more people, and for government to STOP SPENDING, on all but the most basic and essential of services - transportation, utilities, and national security.

But that's not going to happen because after promising change Obama built a cabinet of all the same old Washington insiders, most of them from the Clinton administration. He chose a VP who was arguably one of the worst pork barrel spenders in the senate. And instead of reaching across the isle and working with republicans on the stimulus bill he basically said screw you, we have the numbers and we'll do what we want.

It really torqued me off when Obama and Biden got on the news yesterday to express outrage at the news that Wall Street moguls took $18.4 billion in bonus payouts. Isn't this exactly what one would expect to happen when the government starts throwing out billions of dollars to the same greedy and corrupt people that got us into this mess? Is Obama going to be shocked again when the automobile companies who are failing due to inefficiency and lack of innovation, come back and ask for another bailout next year? We're in real trouble people, and its just getting deeper.

Future Winter Olympian

2009-01-17T14:08:00.000-08:00

You should have seen Anna on the slopes you gize! She was the awesome one. She did great. She definitely fell a lot less than my first time out. She progressed so fast, and if she keeps it up she'll be skiing with the big boys in no time. It was a lot of fun. Anna actually did better without poles, but gave me some good chuckles with her quirky arm movements. I'll have to get some video next time.

She was a great student because she didn't get too frustrated and never wanted to quit. I hope we can ski together again soon.

Who's next?

Not to be left out....

2009-01-12T11:26:00.000-08:00

This is it... My good old High School combination lock. I still use it today for my locker in the men's locker room in the Richards building where Cherie and I play racquetball several times a week. It works just as well as when I used it daily in High School, and I expect it will last me the rest of my life. I never have to do anything to maintain it, and I can pretty much count on it always working. I have put it in a drawer and not used it for years, but never forgot the combination. It is very useful to me, but would be useless to you -unless of course I gave you the combination. Likewise yours would be useless to me. Mine looks just like the one in the picture and they still sell them today.
So, a tribute to the high school combination lock. Probably the most reliable thing I will ever own.

Yep, it still fits!

First I-Phoneless Support group meeting

2009-01-08T07:22:00.000-08:00

I got cc'd on an e-mail this morning from one of the professors in my department. Notice the last line of the e-mail.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
IT Professor wrote:
> Other IT Professor-
>
> It turns out that my TA for IT101 has a conflict with the Forensics
> class and has had to withdraw. Will you and Mark be OK doing the lab
> tomorrow?
>
> If you know of anyone who wants a TA position let me know.
>
> Thanks - IT Professor
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

What is it with the I-Phone users that they always have to let you know that they sent it from their I-Phone? Does it really matter where they sent it from? Are they just trying to rub some more salt in that wound? It's just cruel.

I need a daily affirmation and I need it now!

Edit: I forgot to mention that this professor is at a conference in Hawaii... makes the story even crueler!

For Amy

2009-01-07T11:55:00.001-08:00

Sorry Amy, I keep forgetting that not everyone has a big gorgeous wide screen monitor like this:

.

For Katie

2009-01-07T10:09:00.001-08:00

It's SO Hot Here!!

2009-01-07T09:01:00.001-08:00

Some of you may be hesitant to move to Utah because of the cold weather, but I have proof that it is really very warm during the winter. In fact it's pretty darn hot. Here is the actual temperature this morning as I was driving to work. This car wash is between Springville and Provo. It's a wonder the snow hasn't melted. Maybe this is what is referred to as a cold day in Hell?

I also took these pics this morning. This one out the back door...

and this one out the front. I can't wait to go skiing you gize!!

A Case For Polygamy

2009-01-06T10:00:00.000-08:00

Ticket To Ride and Zarahemla are my favorite games, but I really only like to play each game with 3 players. With two players they are too easy - there's just no challenge. But with four they are too hard - everything gets too congested. Three is the perfect number. Should I get another wife?

BTW, don't even think about buying Ticket To Ride, without the expansion pack.

Support Group

2009-01-06T08:35:00.000-08:00

I am thinking of starting a support group for those of us who are still I-Phone deprived. Our numbers are dwindling and we will soon be in the minority. We need to be able to cry on each others shoulders, and give each other daily affirmations, like "Just because everyone else has an I-Phone doesn't mean they are better than you. You are good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people like you."

Our Cruise - and Christmas Vacation

2008-12-31T08:15:00.001-08:00

Landee is not the only one who went on a cruise you gize. Here is a video of our awesome African cruise:

Ok, more on that adventure later... first we drove to AZ to drop of Zach and visit Cherie's family. While there we visited a house where the owner had spent over a million dollars putting in a giant train set in his back yard. It was interesting, but I think if I had a million dollars I would do something different.

In fact if I had a million dollars and HAD to spend it on something for my back yard, I decided what it would be. If you are familiar with Disney's California Adventure, there is a rapids ride called Grizzly Rapids. If you walk along the pathway that goes behind the entrance to the ride, you cross a bridge and behind the bridge is an enormous water fall cascading over fake boulders and going under the bridge. Yeah... I want THAT in my back yard.

So, after a couple days in AZ, Cherie and I drove to Anaheim and went to the Magic Kingdom... the happiest place on earth... my favorite place... DISNEYLAND!!

We had two-day park hoppers. We were going to go on Christmas eve and Christmas day, but it was rainy and windy on Christmas day so we stayed in the hotel and recuperated that day, and went the day after Christmas, which was a gorgeous day.

Here's my honey... yuk, yuk....

And here's me.... look how UN-Crowded it was on Christmas eve! We walked on almost every ride. We even rode Splash Mountain twice without getting out of the log - there are not too many takers for Splash Mountain on a cold overcast day.

Of course we hopped over to California Adventure. Here's C in front of Grizzly Rapids - wish I had gotten a picture of that waterfall.

Oh, here we go... I found a couple pics from a previous trip:

The lake at Paradise Pier was drained... cool huh?

Normally it looks like this:

C and I are like kids here and like to go on the rides over and over again. We work the Fast Pass system to perfection and rarely stand in a line for more than 5 - 10 minutes even when it's crowded (which it was - very crowded - the day after Christmas).

We love this ride - we've gone on it 9 times in a row and at least 13 times in one day:

And this ride:

That one I can only handle a few times in a row before I start feeling the urge to upchuck.

But here is my all time favorite ride:

I can go on this ride over....

and over...

and over...

and over again! And scream like a little girl every time.

We love how Disneyland is decorated at Christmas:

And the fireworks are spectacular:

And now that I live in Utah it is very funny watching all the people revel in the glory of soap bubbles drifting down upon them:

Here are the Disney Characters saying goodnight, and us saying goodbye 'til who knows when:
::wiping away a tear::

After D-land we drove to Bakersfield to visit the fam there. Here is my 4 generation pic:

One more pic I have to show. The last time I highlighted Cherie's hair I went a little overboard. When the roots grew out she had this two-toned hair style (see family picture at the top). Her daughter Colleen tried to fix it while we were in AZ, but it didn't work out too well. So on Christmas day I dyed it for her - 45 minutes on the bottom frosted part, and 15 minutes on the top - blended in to make it look even. It came out pretty good don't you think? A lady in our ward told me last night that she wants to set up an appointment. It's nice to know I have a second career option!

::Edit:: Just wanted to add that I have loved catching up on your blogs. It was just too much to be able to leave comments on all of them (amazing how much I missed in just a few days) but believe me I read them all, and was very entertained. I think it's awesome how Mary has become one of the best bloggers ever with tons of pictures and almost daily posts... way to go sis!

Our Horns Can Pierce The Sky

2008-12-22T20:39:00.000-08:00

Favorite Foto Friday and a Merry Christmas!

2008-12-19T08:06:00.000-08:00

I don't actually have a picture to post, but my new favorite foto is on the front of a Christmas card I received. Yeah, I think you know the one I am talking about. I will scan it in some day so I can make it my computer wallpaper (unless somebody would save me the trouble and send me their digital copy). Right now it's sitting on my desk at work, and I'm sure that come July people will be wondering why I still have a Christmas card on my desk. I love this picture you gize. It has some of my favorite and funniest people in it. I seriously wish I could have been there for that photo shoot.

In other news: I ditched work yesterday to go skiing. I wish I could say it was wonderful, but I'm afraid it was just too early in the season. Almost all of the lifts were still closed so only a small part of the mountain was skiable. And there wasn't quite enough snow so I kept running over rocks. It was still fun, but I regret wasting a vacation day and one of my precious passes for it.

Tomorrow we leave for our Christmas circuit - UT - AZ - CA - UT. We'll drop Zach off at his dad's and spend a couple days in AZ visiting Cherie's family. Then Minnie and me will go spend Christmas Eve and Christmas day at Disneyland and CA Adventure. Our kids will be disappointed that once again we are going to Disneyland without them, but we don't have the kids for Christmas and this is our gift to each other. We've been selling stuff on e-bay for months to pay for it; and the low gas prices help too (srsly, we are paying $1.25 a gallon in Springville!).
Then we will spend a couple days in Bako visiting the fam there.

I hope you all have a very merry Christmas! Love, Markie.

Burn-Z's Emotional Farewell

2008-12-17T12:46:00.000-08:00

Cinaburn is on his mission you gize! Recognizing his amazing talents, intelligence, good looks, and charismatic personality, the First Presidency called him on a special mission to be an ambassador for the church around the world. What does that mean? I don't know, but it sounds pretty cool.

Here he is getting ready to go through the temple for the first time.

And here he is at the MTC. Doen't he look sharp!

And here he is with the rest of his district, saying goodbye.

It was so hard to say farewell to the little poo loaf that we have come to love and cherish. I don't know if or when we will ever see Burn-Z again. He has outgrown us, and is on to bigger and better things. Will he go to college... start a career... get married... solve world hunger? The possiblities are endless. I know he will be a success at whatever he dedicates himself to.

I put together a little retrospective to help remember the special times we had together.
Goodbye Cinaburn... We love you!

Burn-Z is growing up...

2008-12-09T13:30:00.000-08:00

Three weeks is s a long time in the life of Burn-Z. He ages like a dog you gize. I am happy to announce that he graduated High School!

He was top of his class of course. Here he is giving the valedictorian speech.

And here he is with a couple of his classmates. The girls can't get enough of Burn-Z

After High School he felt like some military training might be useful, and would help him become a man. So he signed up for ROTC!

Here he is getting some jeep training...

... and flanking a tank.

After completing his ROTC training he wanted some more culture in his life. Here he is at the art museum.

He is growing up so fast and I'm afraid he won't be with us much longer. He has sent in his mission papers, and is getting his temple recommend soon.

He wanted me to tell you all that he wants a 46" Plasma HD TV for Christmas, but will settle for a 36" LCD. I am sure that his birth mother and prior foster parents will want to contribute, but everyone else should feel free to pitch in as well. He has been a very good boy don't you think?

Always Use Protection!

2008-12-09T07:40:00.000-08:00

Someone I know with Extra Special Powers recently got a nasty infection. She had to pay $90 to have a geek fix her machine. I don't think she was using protection you gize. Here are some tips for making sure that YOU don't get the RAW* deal.

Symantec's Norton Anti-Virus is probably the most widely used and supported Anti-Virus program out there. It costs around $30. You do need to pay a yearly subscription fee to get daily signature updates (very important) and I think that's probably around $20 a year. I use it under a BYU license so I'm not sure of the exact pricing. If you use this program properly the chances that you are going to get infected with something nasty are pretty slim unless you are just out there looking for trouble.

If you don't want to fork out the money for Norton Anti-Virus, there is a good FREE anti-virus program called AVG Anti-Virus. Just google it, download it, and install it.

There are also some good on-line virus scanners - no need to install anything, just run the scan from the website. Here are a few:

Housecall at TrendMicro
http://housecall.trendmicro.com/hous...start_corp.asp
Make sure you tick Auto Clean

BitDefender Free Online Virus Scan
http://www.bitdefender.com/scan/licence.php
Make sure you tick AutoClean under Scan Options

Panda ActiveScan
http://www.pandasoftware.com/actives..._principal.htm
Make sure you tick Disinfect automatically under Scan Options

eTrust Antivirus Web Scanner
http://www3.ca.com/securityadvisor/virusinfo/scan.aspx

A couple of good programs for Adware, and Spyware removal are Spybot Search and Destroy, and Ad-Aware - both free.

I love Spybot Search and Destroy and it has a great immunization feature which will protect your machine from lots of nasty stuff.

Also, if you have a wireless router in your house make sure that router is secure! Either use WPA encryption (WEP encryption is easily cracked), or set up MAC address filtering - here's where you'll probably need to borrow a geek for a while.

*RAW = Random Acts of Weirdness.

Birthday Kids!

2008-12-03T12:08:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday to Jennifer (Dec. 3) and Zachary (Dec. 4). I love these kids you gize!

Jennifer - 17:

My baby girl
Winning smile
Caring heart
A daredevil
Very funny
Loves to sing
Super cute
Loves to play games
Boy crazy :o(

Zachary - 15:

The man child
Scuba Diver
Dirt bike rider
Super funny
Hard worker
Great helper
Good student
Loves his mom
Can't wait to drive :o(

Zachary and Jennifer together = A great time!
This slide show is a little long (2:20), but hopefully captures the fun personalities of these two amazing kids:

The week in review

2008-12-01T08:13:00.000-08:00

Friday - Long drive. Arrived at Liz's to find nobody home, and no running water. Apparently the pump went out on the well located on the crazy old neighbor's property. The cruisers got home an hour or so later - very tired and ready for bed.
Saturday - Still no running water. We went to Scott's baptism - awesome talks by Molly and Amanda - and down to the river for the actual dunking:

Then it was off to mom's 80th birthday celebration. I just realize as I type this that we didn't get a group picture with my mom and her kids... Doh. Here are some pics from the party:

Sunday - Still no water. We took a shower at Memzy's and got to visit with Jenny and Erin a little more before they headed back to Vegas.
What's this tickle in the throat that Cherie and I are feeling?
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday - It's all a blur and not much to tell. The tickles in the throat are officially colds. And we still have no water. And is Sambo going to play Rock Band at full volume with his friends until 4am EVERY night? - answer - YES.
We went nowhere except to the drug store for medicine and ear plugs, and to Memzy's, and Elvira's to take an occasional shower.
There were a couple of highlights though:
- Spending time with Jennifer, Sam, Ly, and the greatest grandson on earth.

...and an unexpected drop-in visit while we were at Memzy's from one of my new very favorite bloggers, Lee Fleming (aka Quesetescapa) and her extremely cute kids. It was a great pleasure to be able to meet and visit with her for a little while. She is very funny and super smart. She hinted at a possible move to Utah County... I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Thursday: Still no water!! My amazing Sis & BIL feed us a huge brunch, and cater an incredible Thanksgiving feast. It was all a Thanksgiving should be, and I ate WAY too much.
Friday: Cherie and I get up at 5:30 to hit the Target Black Friday sale. It actually wasn't too bad. Everything we were looking for was in stock and not too hard to get to. We even checked out out fairly quickly. We had a crazy thought of going over to Walmart but when we saw the 1/4 mile line of people outside waiting to get in (this was 3 hours after the store opened) we decided to just drive on by. We celebrated Jenny's 17th birthday (actually Dec. 3rd) by taking her to Olive Garden. Zuppa Toscana is ooooh so good! We also played some Ticket To Ride, and Mexican Train - which my 80 yr. old mother totally dominated. Oh, and still no water. We decided to check out Tim and Brenda's medicine cabinets this time.
Saturday: Long drive.
We had a nice week, but are SO glad to be back home to our own beds, and running hot and cold water! It's nice to be back to my blog too. Miss me?

Freecycle

2008-11-18T07:54:00.000-08:00

I have just discovered Freecycle. Actually I heard about it a long time ago, but I just used it for the first time a few days ago. We have two labs and only one dog house, and its just not big enough for the two of them, so I decided to post a "Wanted" add on Craigslist and Freecycle. We still don' t have an offer of a dog house, but I am now totally facinated by the daily updates I am getting from Freecycle. It's amazing the stuff that people are asking for, and giving away. Here is an example from today's listing. By the way this "Offer" was immediately "Taken". I'm so glad they have a good home now!

I suppose the person who picked these up will indeed have a Free-Cycle.

Milestones for Burn-Z

2008-11-15T21:13:00.001-08:00

Did you think Burn-Z was sitting around doing nothing? No Way! This kid is on the fast track to success. Can you believe he earned his Eagle Scout award in only 2 weeks?!!

With his love for climbing trees it was only obvious he would choose tree planting for his Eagle Project.

With his eagle under his belt he set his sights on getting his drivers license.

It wasn't easy coming up with the dough for another car, especially since Burn-Z has some expensive tastes. But we felt he deserved our support because of the amazing progress he has made in school. Check out out his report card!!

Can you believe the courses he is taking? He has some of the top teachers in the nation. He is obviously in an accelerated program and appears to be poised to graduate early.

Anyway, here he is on his first day as an officially licensed driver.

Now that he had his license he was anxious to go on his first date. Of course before he started dating we felt like we needed to sit him down for another one of our famous lectures and have a talk about the facts of life.

He asked out a girl at school named Cinder Ella. They made such a cute couple. They burned it up on the dance floor and then went to late showing of Hellboy II. I asked him if he kissed her goodnight. He said yes, and I have to admit it was a bit of a relief when he told me it was kinda crumby.

FFFCC

2008-11-14T07:04:00.000-08:00

Favorite Fotos From Cambria California

Bailey Family Reunion - circa '83

Young bloggers in training

1/3 of The Seattle 6

Two FF's and a BONUS PIC!

2008-11-07T08:44:00.000-08:00

A very chubby Samantha

A very tired Jennifer

And your bonus pic...

Heather, Sara, Jenny

Change

2008-11-05T08:22:00.000-08:00

George Washington

Thomas Jefferson

Abraham Lincoln

Theodore Roosevelt

Barack Obama

Welcome back Burn-Z

2008-11-02T14:31:00.000-08:00

Well, thanks to over-crowding Burn-Z is back after only one week in the Slate Canyon Youth Detention facility, in order to make room for more hardened criminals. Despite his short time there he appears to have a much better attitude. He has a sincere desire to turn his life around. He was released Friday morning, and we immediately got him enrolled at the local High School and he willingly signed up for Seminary. We're so proud!

Here is Burn-Z getting ready for Halloween on Friday night. He's a little old for trick-or-treating, but he got lots of candy at the ward trunk-or-treat party.

Saturday I spent a little male bonding time with Z. We played some one-on-one Basketball (check out his slam dunk!), a little baseball with a couple of his friends, and I taught some of the fundamentals of golf.

Zach let him ride his motorized scooter in the afternoon. He had fun, but had a nasty wipe out. Don't worry, he's fine.

He went to church with us.. no coaxing required, and after church he actually joined us in a game of Ticket To Ride. Then he hung out on the computer for a while downloading music for his I-Pod. I had to kick him off so I could get this post in.

He's a great kid, and I think we're all gonna be fine. We plan to start working on some scout awards next week. Keep ya posted.

...or is it Assistant TO the Regional Manager?

2008-10-30T08:41:00.000-07:00

One our our students told me yesterday that he was just offered a job as an Assistant Regional Manager. The beautifully ironic part is that his name is Scott Michael.

A new arrival... The saga of Burn-Z

2008-10-26T19:17:00.000-07:00

As you may recall this blogger brought a new little bundle of joy into the world. Here is her story in her own words:

"I remember the day I gave birth to Cinaburn. It was a long hard labor. I pushed for two hours, even though I was only supposed to push for 10 minutes. When he came out all black and poohy like that, I knew I couldn't show him to my white husband, if you know what I mean, but at the same time, how could I throw away something so curious looking? I knew then that I would be giving him up for adoption. He just didn't match the rest of my family. Now he's in the foster system, where he's happy."

Well, Cinaburn has been passed around the foster system for a couple months now, spending time with families in California, Utah, and Colorado.

Now, I know that Cinaburn was well cared for by all his foster parents. He was even taken on a world tour with stops in France, Russia, and China. But being passed around the system and lacking discipline and structure began to take a toll on young Mr. Burns' character. In short, he was getting into some serious trouble.

I can't say I didn't foresee this. I wrote a very personal letter to his last foster parent that I reluctantly share with you here:

"I was so touched by his birth story, and Jenny, I think you did the right thing by putting Cinaburn up for adoption. Just remember to use protection next time you're at the bakery. You're lucky you didn't get a yeast infection.
Now I'm sure Burn[s]y had a great time on vacation, but I hope your not neglecting his education. He will also need some structure and discipline. I am thinking he needs a strong father figure.
Now, I know that I once dressed like little bo-peep, but I am a man now, and I believe I can give little P.L. the stability he needs at this time in his life.
My goals will be to make sure he gets his Eagle Scout award, and his High School diploma, and prepare him for his mission and higher education.
Don't make me have to go to court for custody. I am prepared to do what it takes to make sure Young Mr. Burns becomes a productive member of society.
I will not rest until Cinaburn is safely in my care."

Well, common sense prevailed and on Friday we welcomed Cinaburn to our home.

We were so excited to have him with us, but it was apparent almost immediately there there were some issues that would take some patience and hard work to deal with. First of all he wouldn't let us call him Cinaburn. He says he goes by Burn-Z now. Not "Burnsy", no that's not cool... it's Burn-Z.

The next issue was the gangster-like apparel that he arrived in. I tried to get him to change into some more respectable clothes but ran into heavy resistance. I thought it better to choose my battles and let him wear what he wants for now. Then there was the note that his previous foster mother Landeelu, who I am sure has only the best of intentions, sent along with his belongings:

We wanted to give Burn-Z the benefit of the doubt, and let him have some space. He was moody from the start. We asked if he wanted to join us in some family games, or a movie, but instead he went outside and climbed in a tree and just hung out there for hours.

Then he started harrasing our dogs under the fence.

We sat him down and gave him a talking to, but his attitude was a little out of control.

He ran away once. He kept asking questions about his real parents. We didn't want him finding out the truth so we just told him his parents were dead. After looking all around town we finally found him at the cemetery.

Things reached a head when he pulled a knife on Zach. They were playing Halo on the X-Box and Zach lobbed a grenade that accidentally blew up Burn-Z's character. Zach came out of his room screaming and we knew we had to take action.

It took some tough love, but we marshaled Burn-Z down to Juvenile court, where he was sentenced to spend some time in the Slate Canyon Juvenile Detention Center.

We miss him already, but this is exactly the kind of discipline and tough love that I had in mind when I agreed to take on this responsibility. I have great faith that this will be a learning and life changing opportunity for him. I trust he will be released soon, and we will update you on young Mr. Burns' progress.

Keep him in your prayers.
Love, Markie & Cherie.

Aloha Friday

2008-10-24T09:19:00.000-07:00

If not for Favorite Foto Friday I might not ever blog. My life is just not that interesting right now. It's not like I'm jetting off to Seattle to hunt for vampires or anything. I even had a hard time trying to come up with an interesting picture for FFF. But if my brothers ever check out my blog they should get a kick out of this one.

After my mission my amazing mother took her 9 kids and their spouses (I was un-espoused at the time) to Hawaii. It was an incredible trip and created memories for a lifetime.

One of them was this amazing luau.

Its a long story in itself - full of drama, hilarity, anguish, tears and laughter - of how we even scored the tickets to this show.

Anyway, here are two of my bro's - Sam and Dan on stage in front of hundreds, showing their bellies off as they learn how to hula.

Fortunately I didn't volunteer for this one, but I did join the kissing line that came later. Like I said, I was single.

They are so white and nerdy... I love it!!

Gotta send a shout out to the girls of "Team Edward" who are frolicking around Forks, WA. I can't wait for the play-by-play. Have fun!!

Pho-Toga-Friday

2008-10-17T07:54:00.000-07:00

That's me on the left. If there's a story behind this picture I've forgotten it (it was the 70's).

The one who is not all white and nerdy is Marvin, my Navaho Indian brother. Yatahey Marvin!

Foto Friday x 2

2008-10-10T07:09:00.000-07:00

Here is a little gem from a long time ago - Jenny E. after a pie eating contest!

And I can't wait another week to post this little beauty...

SNOW!

2008-10-06T13:20:00.000-07:00

I bought my 5 day pass to Canyons ski resort last week, and the mountains got their first dusting of snow over the weekend so I am totally stoked for ski season. Here is a picture from Alta ski resort taken today (10/6).
While I was looking through some old pictures over the weekend, I found a "doodle" I made in High School. I am certain I made it while sitting in seminary waiting for class to end. It reminded me of how much I loved skiing back then. I was hooked from our first trip. It was a youth trip and the Bishop taught us how to ski. From then until my mission that was just about all I thought about.
When I got back from my mission I immediately started skiing again, but with college, marriage, kids, bills, etc. obstacles began to mount to the point that I just got out of the habit. When we moved to Utah I started skiing again, and now I love it as much or more as I did when I was a young high school kid. I am kicking myself for the almost 2 decades that I didn't ski; and now I am worried about how many good skiing years my older body has left. I plan to make the most of them.
And Anna, I haven't forgotten that you told me you would let me teach you how to ski this year! If you reneg, you will be severely flanked!

Alvin and the Chipmunks

2008-10-05T13:01:00.000-07:00

Foto Friday

2008-10-03T07:05:00.001-07:00

Here is my Friday Foto. My bro. Sam took this pic of the Jenster through his fisheye lens, and it just makes me smile!

Jr. High Graduation & Prom Pics

2008-10-02T18:22:00.000-07:00

First here are a few Jr. High School graduation pics of Cherie and I.
Look at those smiles!! She's such a cutie!
Trying to draw your attention away from the tie and white belt

Ok, here are the prom pics
This is our High School prom (Jr. Year) - 1978
Look at that golden hair...
trying to draw your attention away from the frilly lace shirt.

Bike Ride

2008-10-02T12:47:00.000-07:00

Saturday our department faculty and families went for a bike ride down Provo canyon to a park down by Utah Lake. It's a gorgeous bike trial and passes right under Bridal Veil Falls.
Cherie and I are in the middle of the pic. Zach had a sleep over and didn't want to get up early Sat. morning to join us. A couple of the prof's and their wives didn't take the bike ride, but met us down at the park later, for a picnic lunch.
In other news... Cherie landed a part time job working in the BYU Bookstore. She had an orientation on Monday, and did a little register training yesterday. I think they mainly plan on using her for peak times, like when students are buying or selling back their textbooks.
A nice perk is that now we get an even better discount at the bookstore. We did get a 10% discount, but not on sale items. Now we get a 20% discount even on top of the sale price. I went to buy The Hunger Game yesterday, and they had it on order, and it won't come in until next week, but when it does it will be on sale for 25% off, then we get an extra 20% so the book will cost us like $10. Not bad huh?
Cherie is excited to have her foot in the door at BYU and plans to go full time when Zach graduates.

I will try and find my prom pic tonight and do some scanning. Cherie hates that pic (yes, she was my date), so it may be deeply hidden, and if she finds out what I'm up to it may never happen. As I remember we only went to the Jr. Prom. It was kind of a disaster... story for another time.

The Host - Cast Of Characters

2008-09-28T16:43:00.000-07:00

I like how Amy selected actual people to portray a couple of the characters from The Host, and I want to dedicate a post for nominating actors and actresses to play the main characters in the move version of the book. I will start by nominating this guy to play Jeb:

He plays Tom on Lost, and he was all I could picture whenever I read about Jeb.

So, who would you pick to play Jared, Ian, Melanie, Wanda, The Seeker (did she have a name?), Jeremy, and any other character you have an image in mind for?

The Host, and my two cents.

2008-09-28T15:58:00.000-07:00

Whoa, its a good thing I decided to check the blogs today or I would have missed the big book review party. Thanks for the advance notice - Hiss.

I was pleased to find that Stephanie didn't abandon the word Hiss just because there were no vampires in this book. I didn't count, but I remember reading the word several times throughout The Host. I thought maybe vampires were the only ones who hissed, but I was wrong.

So... what can I say about The Host? On one hand, I was actually pleasantly surprised. I had such very low expectations for this book. I REALLY didn't want to read it, and was SO disappointed that it was chosen. As an aside comment - Jenny this is YOUR club, and you have final say in what book is selected. I for one don't think you have to select the book that the majority of people choose. I have learned that the majority of the people are often idiots. Look at some of the Presidents we have elected. If the majority of the people vote for the writings of Isaiah as found in the Old Testament, and re-recorded in the Book of Mormon as our next reading selection I am counting on you to veto it! Now to continue....

Maybe having such low expectations made me enjoy the book more than I otherwise would have. I actually thought it contained some good thought-provoking writing. I thought the characters were interesting and fairly well developed - with one possible exception I'll get to later. I know many of you had a hard time getting through it, but I was actually compelled by the story and got through the book in a week. I was also grateful for the lack of a lot of sappy romantic stuff. Sure, there was this love triangle thing, but I think that people who were reading it for the romance would likely be disappointed. Maybe when I read your comments I'll find I was wrong, but that's how I felt.

Now on to the things I didn't like so much about the book. First of all, I was disappointed that Stephanie didn't give us enough stuff to make fun of. Again, maybe after reading your reviews I will find out I was wrong. You people have a talent for finding humor in just about anything. But I was hoping for more creepy boob-biting baby kind of stuff. I started to get my hopes up when I began to imagine a scenario where Melanie/Wanda ended up with both Jared and Ian. Maybe Jared taking Melanie on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, and two Sundays a month; and Ian getting Wanda (in Malanies body) on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays, and the other two Sundays. But alas, she had to go and separate the two and spoil our fun.

I think my major complaint about the book was much the same as in the Twilight series. I wanted some action! So many chapters ended with me thinking that something big and exciting was going to happen in the next chapter, only to find that they were still in the cave and avoided any further confrontations with other aliens/hosts. I kept thinking that on a raid one of them would be captured. I really thought a battle would break out when Melanie/Wanda got caught stealing medicine from the hospital, but no, it all went as planned. Again when the alien cop pulled them over on the highway, I was sure the jig was up, and all heck would break loose, but again, smart thinking and smooth talking conveniently avoided any unnecessary confrontations. Even when the seeker finally found them they were able to keep her from telling anyone else, and their little cave life could go on undisturbed. It seemed that every time my adrenaline would just start pumping, the author conveniently diffused the situation and lowered my heart rate, along with my hope for a good time.

I began to really wish that these aliens who were taking over human bodies, were not such nice, kind, well behaved creatures. Since they were so peaceful, why didn't they just come to earth and let us treat them like pets? We would have been OK with that. Its not like they had fangs or sucked blood or anything. They had lived as sea kelp, and flowers, and animals before and seemed to be pretty OK with that. With the billions of life forms on planet earth, whey didn't they come and live as otters, or panda bears?

Of course the seekers were a little more aggressive than the other aliens, but I'm still not sure why. The seeker that was after Melanie was the character that I felt was not very well developed. I kept wondering through the entire book why she was SO motivated to find Wanda; and in the end I found the explanation to be kind of lame. What was it? That she had a hard time suppressing her host too, and wondered how Melanie dealt with it? Yeah, that was not a very satisfying explanation for me. I would have like to have seen things from her perspective. I think the story would have been more interesting to me if it had gone back and forth between the hunter, and the hunted. Throughout the book I knew that the seeker was out there looking for Melanie/Wanda, but for large chunks of the story we didn't know what she was doing and what was driving her search.

When I finished the book Cherie told me she wasn't planning on reading it, and that I could tell her what it was about, and how it ended. I think that's when I realized that there wasn't much of a point to the book. I think I was able to explain the story line pretty much until the end where my explanation of the ending went something like this:

...so in the end, it turns out that some aliens make friends with their hosts and are cool with it. Some want to leave their hosts, but remain on the planet. Some are cool with going to another planet, but if they leave the body, sometimes the body is kinda useless. Some of them destroy the host's brain just for spite. Wanda wants to leave her host, only to be buried in the desert, I don't know why; but her friends implant her in another body instead. I'm not sure what they will do with all the other alien infected people; they don't really have any future plans.

All in all, I thought the book was LONG. They spent way too much time in the caves, and I just kept waiting for something exciting to happen. I don't need battles in every book, but books about alien body snatchers, and vampires and werewolves ought to have a few good fights in them. Still, I thought the main characters were interesting and the little love triangle was intriguing. I think Stephanie Meyer is a good writer, but has yet to create a story with a great beginning, middle AND end. The book was more mindless entertainment in my opinion and I don't feel the need to ever read it again. Please, don't all list your books on e-bay at the same time as mine, ok?

The photo you have all been waiting for...

2008-09-26T08:22:00.001-07:00

Speaking of being left out.... apparently I didn't get the memo about changing your profile photo to one of your childhood pics. But being the brilliant deductionist that I am, I eventually got a clue. So I started looking for a childhood pic to post, and ran across the infamous Bo Peep picture. Since Michelle has been threatening to post this, I might as well do a preemptive strike and release it to the public.
We actually had a little lamb when I was around this age. I don't know why it wasn't in this picture. Maybe it had already mysteriously disappeared. If I am not mistaken it was eaten by the enormous Great Dane that lived next door. That dog could eat entire cantaloupes, rind and all, that we tossed over the fence. I'm sure I was carefully sheltered from what actually happened to our little lamb at the time.
I guess because of the lamb they decided to dress me up as little Bo Peep. I would say that it didn't do me any irreparable damage, but here I am today, blogging just like one of the girls. Oh well, scoff if you will (Cristin's Hubby)... I just can't quit you.

Daily Affirmation

2008-09-25T08:42:00.000-07:00

Everyone take a moment to look in the mirror, and say out loud....
"I'm good enough. I'm smart enough. And doggone it... people like me!"

Another testosterone boost

2008-09-20T19:56:00.001-07:00

Yesterday Cherie scored actual tickets to today's BYU game! It was awesome. BYU once again shut out the opposing team (Wyoming), winning 44 - 0.

Here is a news release posted BEFORE the game (update stats by 1).

COUGARS CONTINUE TO WIN
With their 59-0 win over UCLA, the Cougars’ extended their nation-leading winning streak to 13 games. BYU has won 25 of its last 29 games, dating back to the 2006 season. During that season, the Cougars finished 11-2, followed by another 11-2 season in 2007, and they are off to a 3-0 start this season. BYU’s 3-0 record this season marks its best start since the 2001 season.

I am also pleased to announce that I finished The Host- in less than a week. Good thing I got my testosterone booster today.

Could you use a smile today?

2008-09-19T10:10:00.000-07:00

I made a funny...

2008-09-17T07:21:00.000-07:00

Last night I was having a hard time getting comfortable (sometimes our queen sized bed just isn't big enough for the two of us) when the following exchange took place:

Me: Sometimes I wish I could just detach my arms and lay them on the floor when I went to bed.

Cherie: What if someone broke into the house?

Me: Well, I guess they would find me unarmed.

Who's manly now??

2008-09-14T13:44:00.000-07:00

So I was definitely feeling the need for a testosterone boost and thankfully Dan came through with the perfect remedy. A gathering of manly men to watch the BYU vs UCLA game yesterday.
We watched the game on his man sized plasma screen TV, and we ate massive quantities of manly food including some very hot and manly salsa, and of course beef cooked over open flame on a dirty grill. We yelled and grunted in a manly way, as if we were actually the ones on the field, and we passed manly gasses.
The women worked on a quilt in the other room where I swear I heard some talk of "cycles" and ovarian cysts and other such ridiculously girly stuff. Then the girls made brownies for the manly men; no doubt as a reward for our valiant efforts to urge our team on to victory (its exhausting work).

We must have done one incredibly manly job too, because BYU absolutely slaughtered UCLA.... 59 to Zero!! We are awesome aren't we?! GO COUGARS!!
After the game I was feeling so manly that I was able to go to Sam's Club and buy The Host. I just hope my testosterone high is enough to last me through the book, and until the next meeting of the He-Man Woman Haters Club. I also bought some flowers for my wife... just because. I don't know if that's manly or not, but it felt good.
BTW, the pic's were shamelessly pirated in a manly way, from BYU's web site.

Sorry Cristin, it was nice knowing you...

2008-09-12T15:01:00.000-07:00

Cristin said
"...my friend Steph talks about why she didn't end in a big gory scene at the end and it's only because she knew that people we love would die..."

Cristin, the next time you talk to your friend, reminder her that SHE is the one writing the story!

Landee nailed it when she said:
"...Stephenie didn't have to kill anyone we loved... she could have killed off any of those 50 people we met right there at the end! I wanted some ripping and burning and I wanted it now. If I wanted to resolve concerns and build relationships of trust I would have gone on a mission fhs!"

I LOVE IT!!
Cristin, your out of the family, Landee your in... expect your first Bailey Quarterly Newsletter in a few weeks (Cristin's name will be scratched out and yours written over the top)

My Breaking Dawn Review

2008-09-11T10:55:00.000-07:00

I had a great time last night reading all of your reviews. By the way, I don’t know who Landeelu is but I hope she comes to our next reunion. She is HILARIOUS! I am now an official blog stalker. Anyway, I think you all summed it up very well. But here are a few of my ramblings that have been on my mind that I guess I didn’t feel got adequately vented on the other reviews I read.

I’ll start by saying I enjoyed the first three books quite a bit - in general. There were a few things that made it difficult to suspend the ol’ disbelief. For example, I find it hard to believe that a perpetually 17 year old Edward “saved himself” for over a century until he found Bella. I didn’t see anything particularly special about Bella. Like you all said she was kinda whiney, and the author didn’t give her any particularly special attributes or characteristics that would really endear her to the reader and make you think she was worth the wait. The only way it made any sense to me, was to imagine that Vampires are also susceptible to “imprinting” and for some reason Edward imprinted on Bella.

I also can’t help but comparing this teenage Vampire story to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I think that Joss Whedon did a MUCH better job of writting teenage angst, and the conflict between wanting to kill the bloodsuckers, while at the same time being hopelessly in love with one of them. I could see why Bella would go gaga over Edward, but not why she was so eager to give up humanity and cheeseburgers for cold hard skin, and blood smoothies.

Still, it was good mindless entertainment, like a Saturday matinee; you know its not going to be up for any Academy Awards, but that’s not why you went to see it anyway.

Breaking Dawn was definitely our least favorite. I won’t get into the whole creepy baby, boob biting, ovary imprinting, thing that was so well covered in all the other reviews. I also agree that Renesmee was a VERY annoying name (remember I was reading this book out loud to Cherie); it didn’t take us long to agree to just call her Renny - like Jenny, but with an R.

My main problem with the book was the very unsatisfying ending. Not the “happily ever after”… that’s all good, but the fact that there was all this build up to the big confrontation with the Volturi that ended up going NOWHERE! I wanted a battle, and a BIG one!

The Harry Potter series was great because you just knew that those books were leading up to a final battle between good and evil. And it paid off big time, with a couple of incredibly awesome wars. I thought it was a great development in the Twilight series that different Vampires had different special abilities. It kind of reminded me of X-Men, but, unlike X-Men, they never got to put their talents to the test… NO PAYOFF! What was the point of developing all these characters and explaining their abilities just to have them all stand and stare at each other during some lame negotiation and then all walk away?

The Volturi needed to die. They were so arrogant and annoying, and liked to trick people into thinking they were going on a great European vacation only to find out in the end that they picked the wrong travel agent. That alone (bilking people out of their hard earned vacation money) was reason enough for me to want to see them all ripped to shreds by werewolf teeth. Think of all those poor werewolves who had just recently changed, and didn’t get to see any action at all. No stories to tell their grandchildren. What about the guy who could control the elements? We didn’t even get to seem him throw a few boulders around. What a let down.

Speaking of boulders... not that I am a big environmentalist or anything… but Bella, haven’t you heard the phrase “God put that rock there for a reason”? And doesn’t anybody care about the lives of all those poor animals out in the forest? Little Bambie is in a peaceful meadow, innocently taking a cool drink out of a crystal clear stream when all of the sudden, BAM, he gets his throat ripped out by a vampire. Aren’t there any park rangers around? Doesn’t anybody notice all the dead deer, elk, bear, and mountain lion carcasses lying around with puncture wounds in their necks? What was wrong with the donated blood diet? I mean they would be more nourished and satisfied, but without killing ANYBODY. I guess maybe someone who needed a transfusion might die in the hospital due to a shortage of blood, but it is still a step better in my mind than going out and destroying all our wildlife. Maybe I am an environmentalist… huh.

It was particularly annoying when they would kill something, and then get distracted by a thought, and wouldn’t even drink the blood. It was like, “Hey we just slaughtered a couple majestic elk, but oh I just remembered I need to talk to Alice… let’s go and leave these carcasses here to rot”. Oh, and also, “For you guest vampires… if you MUST eat some humans… please don’t do it in our neighborhood. There are plenty of good humans in the surrounding counties that I’m sure you will find just as satisfying”. Do I sound bitter?

Despite the disappointments, I still feel like it was worth-while reading for some mindless entertainment. Some of you (Anna) seemed surprised that I would like this kind of stuff. I personally thought the romance stuff was pretty tame. So they broke a headboard and ripped up a pillow… pshhh… that’s nothin’! I was actually surprised that so many of YOU liked it. Confrontations between vampires and werewolves seems like solid guy territory to me, even though it didn’t really go anywhere, which as I’ve already said was my main complaint. And besides, I’m secure enough in my manhood to admit that I can be a sentimental wuss at times. Jane Eyre is one of my all time favorite books, and it’s not because of the battle scenes. However I did get tired, as some of you did, with the word “beautiful” in the Twilight series. Get some new adjectives already.

I also felt sorry for Jacob and can't help but wonder what kind of hellishly freaky kid him and Renny are going to have some day... part human, part vampire, part werewolf. I'm picturing an "If They Mated" segment on Conan O'Brian right now, and it's not pretty.

So you know how on Amazon when you buy something they say “If you like this then you will probably like that”, and show you some other products in the same category. Well, if you all like the Twilight series, I recommend any of the great fantasy adventure series by Terry Brooks; mainly his Shannara series. His first book (The Sword of Shannara) is a little slow and long and an almost blatant rip off Lord of the Rings, but he gets better with each book. Instead of vampires and werewolves there are elves and orcs, and such, but there are some great characters, some nice romance, and GREAT battles!! He knows how to deliver a payoff. Again, it is great mindless entertainment.

Now, I can’t wait to read the reviews when the Twilight movie comes out. I am very skeptical at this point. Most of you, like me, didn’t care for all the hissing in the book. If there is a bunch of hissing, and growling, and crouching in the movie I have a feeling it will be pretty lame. I am also still deciding whether or not to sacrifice some of my beloved TV time with all my favorite series already beginning to come back, to read The Host, just so I can participate in ripping it apart at the next book club meeting. Cherie has already opted out, so if I do decide to read it I should be able to finish it fairly quickly, like in several leg numbing sessions on the pot.

Seacrest Out!

WE FINALLY FINISHED!! BUT.....

2008-09-10T09:53:00.000-07:00

You know how when you are with a group of friends and you tell a funny story and everyone is laughing, and then just as the laughter is dying down and the joke is over some geek walks in and wants to know what was so funny, but you know that now if you retold the story it would just be stale and not as funny. It's like when Jim tells Pam a joke on The Office, and then Michael walks in and has to know what they were laughing about, and then tries to act like he was part of the group all along. Yeah it's just awkward.

So I read the book, but you all finished it weeks ago, talked about it, blogged about it, laughed about it; and now I come walking in the door.... GEEK. So, I will just enjoy reading all your reviews and comments over the next few days, and maybe when Michelle (The only other person in the blogging world who has still not read all four books) finishes, then her and I can have our own little geeky discussion about it.
Now I am debating about whether or not to read The Host. I have heard such mixed reviews about it. Even the Smart Remarks creator, host and person who CHOSE the dang book, had a hard time trying to get through the first half of it. Still, how am I ever going to stop being the geek if I don't read the book in time for the discussion? I know what your thinking... "Don't worry Mark, you will ALWAYS be the geek no matter what you do". It's true, but at least I won't be such an awkward geek. Well.... I'll think about it for a few days.

In other news... Laurie got some free tickets at work to a concert at the SCERA Amphitheater in Orem and Cherie and I went with her and Dan. It was "Imagine" a Beatles tribute band. They were very entertaining and we had a lot of fun, and it was spectacular weather with incredible views of the mountains, a deep blue sky and a bright half moon hanging over the stage. Thanks Laurie!